In The Dark
by CalvinWinchester97
Summary: "And equality for all breakfast foods!" Beck/Jade One-shots. Hopefully you'll get some giggles out of it :  CHAPTER 6 STRONG T
1. You Rock My World Or At Least My RV

**A/N: Okay, I haven't written a fanfic in FOREVER, but I had this idea and I thought I'd upload the story, because, you know, I like it. Anyway... Here it is. At the moment, this is just a one-shot, but more likely than not, it will turn into a series of somewhat-connected one-shots.**

**Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own this lovely, cheesy, and amazing show, Victorious**

Beck's POV

You know when you're having an amazing dream, and then, inexplicably, something wakes you up, and no matter how hard you try you can't get back into the dream? Well that happens to me often, and usually the 'something' is Jade calling for some random and often unnecessary reason. But tonight, it wasn't my phone that woke me up, it was a pounding on the metal of the outside of my RV.

I groaned and rolled off the bed. I should've known by the slight rocking of my house that it was Jade's combat boot that was the cause, but I was still surprised to see her standing there when I opened the door.

"Jade?" She pushed past me as I closed the door, keeping her back to me even though we were in the dark.

"It's 3:00 A.M., Baby." I reminded her.

"I know." She replied quietly, uncharacteristically.

I sat down on my bed. "Are you okay?" I reached over to flip on the lamp on my bedside table, but she stopped me.

"Don't." her voice was pleading.

"Why?" she let go of my wrist.

She was most definitely acting weird, and this was confirmed when she sniffed and said: "Because. I don't want you to see me cry."

"Jade," I was up and had her in my arms before she could protest. "What happened?"

"I had a fight with my parents." Her voice was muffled by my shoulder when she finally spoke. "A bad one. Worse than the rest." She sniffled again.

"He threw a bowl at me." she admitted.

I stiffened, but I didn't let her go. "Your dad threw a bowl at you?" I gritted my teeth and tried not to sound as angry as I was.

She nodded. "It broke."

"Did it cut you?"

"No."

I tightened my grip on her. "Ouch. Beck." she caught her breath sharply.

"I'm sorry." I said, but then thought, why would that have hurt her unless..."Did that really hurt?"

"Yes. I wouldn't have contested otherwise." She grumbled.

I held her back at arm's length. "He did it didn't he? He hurt you," I started to lift her shirt up.

"Beck don't, it's not-" but she stopped protesting when I couldn't keep the gasp from escaping my lips.

Jade was covered in bruises. All over her abdomen, and, as I pushed her shirt up further, her shoulders and arms. I could tell she'd tried to cover them with make up, but it had faded over the course of the day. This explained not only the weird mood, but the fact that we hadn't slept together in weeks.

I let go of her. "I'm going to beat the shit out of him." I announced as I pulled a shirt on.

I was putting shoes on when she reached out and grabbed my arm forcefully. "No Beck." she said authoritatively. "You beating the crap out of my father isn't going to help."

I gave her a doubtful look, but paused. She continued. "If anything it's going to make my life harder."

She had me there. She knew I wasn't going to do anything to make things worse than they already were for her.

"Fine." I relented begrudgingly and led her to bed. "But stay here tonight, okay?"

She smiled as she kicked her shoes off and spooned herself into me. "Okay."

I wrapped my arms around her waist, this time more gently, and buried my nose in her hair. "What were you fighting with your parents about at 3:00 A.M. anyway?" I questioned.

She smelled like vanilla and pumpkin coffee.

"I wasn't, actually. It happened a few hours ago."

"A few hours ago? Why did you wait until now to come over?"

We could've been doing this hours ago.

"Everything always seems worse right after it happens. I thought I could work things out. So I just... walked around for awhile."

"Baby!" I kissed her ear. "Why didn't you call me?"

"I didn't want you to freak out." She mumbled. "And you kinda needed the sleep for your project tomorrow."

"You didn't want me to freak out?" I pushed myself up on one elbow. "You're being considerate. Who are you and what have you done with my girlfriend?"

Jade shoved me back down roughly onto my back. "What? So now I'm not allowed to have a heart?" She laid her head on my chest and threw a leg over my waist.

"I'm sorry." I said. "I like it when you let me know you have a heart."

She scoffed, but we stayed silent for a moment, each of us listening to the other breathe. I'd almost fallen back to sleep when she spoke again.

"Beck?"

"Mhmm?"

"Remember that time when we broke up last year? Because you said I was being a jealous bitch?"

"Yes." I replied.

"And then I told everyone we broke up because you were gay?"

"I remember." I chuckled.

"I don't think I ever told you I was sorry, but I am."

What? Of course I'd known she was sorry, even though she'd never said it. I probably wouldn't have taken her back if she hadn't been. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure."

SURE? SURE? "Why are you being so nice?"

"Because we're in the dark."

"Babe," I reminded her. "We've been alone in the dark before." I laughed.

"Get your mind out of the gutter, Aladdin." She retorted cuttingly.

"What's different about now?" I played with her hair, genuinely curious.

"I'm being honest. It's dark, and I love you."

Wow, I didn't even have to beg for that 'I love you'.

I kissed the top of her head. "I love you too, Princess."

"Beck?"

'"Yes?"

"Never call me 'princess'."

"Yes ma'am."

**A/N: I would really, really love some reviews guys! Constructive criticism= VERY GOOD AND VERY MUCH COVETED, Notes that say 'I love it!' = MUCH LOVED, Notes that say 'I hate it!' = MAKE ME SAD, BUT ARE NO LESS APPRECIATED!**

**Thanks fanfiction peeps! I missed you all!**

**Much Love,**

**Aimee**


	2. What Kind Of Dinosaur?

**AHHH! I am so happy! You wanna know why? 15 reviews! All raving! That's why! **

**You guys are the most amazing readers ever! Thank you soo much! **

** And in response to all the AMAZING messages asking for a quick update, here it is! **

**Disclaimer: Dude, I don't even own a clock. There is NO way I own Victorious.**

Jade's POV

"What?" I answered my phone once I saw it wasn't Beck.

"Um, is this Jade West?" A quiet, squeaky voice asked.

"Yes, why?" I countered the terrified woman with a hint of a smile.

It was fun to terrify people.

"Your fiancé, Beck Oliver? He's been in a car accident. We were instructed to call-"

I jumped up. "Where is he?" I demanded.

"Anderson Hospital on-"

"I know where it is! Tell him I'll be there as soon as possible."

Third-person POV

A young, pretty nurse was checking one of the many monitors in the room another nurse had pointed Jade towards. Beck, who knew she was there even with his eyes closed, was astonished that Jade hadn't yelled at her yet. He kept his eyes closed as she approached the hospital bed.

"Well," she stated. "You look like crap."

The little CNA stared incredulously at Jade. She'd never seen a girlfriend of an accident victim act this way. But Beck chuckled, a wide smile spreading across his face. He'd heard lots of voices since the collision with the little Jag, but it's was Jade's bittersweet, threatening tone he'd wanted to hear most, if you could believe that.

"Thanks." he replied, opening his eyes to see Jade, in her signature black, intricate clothing, arms crossed over her chest, eyes worried. "Good thing you look great enough for both of us."

Jade rolled her eyes. "Does it hurt?" she asked curiously, lightly brushing a finger over the gash on his collar bone.

"I feel like a dinosaur tried to eat me."

The nurse giggled and Jade glared at her, sending the young employee scurrying out of the room.

_There's __my __Jade. _Beck thought, holding his arms out, pleading with her to join him.

"Don't be an idiot." His girl admonished. "That would hurt."

"Hold me?" He begged.

"You've been filleted by your car!"

He stuck out his lower lip, gazing at her with his big, brown puppy dog eyes. "Please?"

"It's going to hurt you." she warned.

"I don't care." he smiled as she relented, climbing up beside him while rolling her eyes again and sighing loudly.

"So," she said, her arms gently encircling his waist, nestling her head in the crook of his neck. "What kind of dinosaur?"

"What?" Beck questioned.

He hugged her close, pretending not to notice the sharp pains coursing through his body with his every move.

"You said you felt like a dinosaur tried to eat you." Jade explained. "I wanted to know what kind of dinosaur."

"Oh," Beck laughed. "Definitely a T-Rex. Named Marvin."

"Marvin?" Jade fairly snorted.

_How __is __it __possible __that __that __snort __is __incredibly __sexy? _Beck mused.

"Don't you think Marvin is a sinister name?" He defended.

"No. Marvin sounds like the name of a leprechaun. A nice, short man in a green suit and red hair."

"Ugh. Leprechauns." Beck said, disgusted. "Almost as bad as dinosaurs who prey upon teenage Indian guys with great hair."

Jade scoffed as he mumbled on. "Doubtlessly as nefarious."

"Nefarious." Jade parroted, a smirk in her voice.

"Are you hating on my vocabulary?" Beck accused.

"Actually. I like the word 'nefarious'." She admitted, playing with his lacerated hand. "And your hair is not that great."

"Whatever." Now it was Beck's turn to smirk. "I know you love it almost as much as you love my 'exquisite' abs." He tried to duplicate her Jersey Man voice.

"I do not." Jade resisted. "And you can't pull off the voice."

"I so can!" Beck protested. "Besides," he smiled evilly. "You talk in your sleep."

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"You tell me all kinds of, ahem, _interesting_things in your sleep."

"What did I say?" Jade demanded, sitting up."

Beck easily pulled her back down beside him. "I'll never tell."

"I will push you off the bed." She threatened.

"No you won't."

"I will. Don't think that just because-"

She was cut off by his lips colliding into hers. She didn't pull away, but refused to part her lips. Beck snaked a hand just below the waistband of her jeans, finding that spot on her hip…

Jade opened her mouth, trying to keep the moan from escaping. He took the opportunity and his tongue shot inside her mouth. "Fine." she murmured against his lips. "You win, I won't push you."

He leaned back to look at her again. "Thanks, because that would've hurt so badly."

She gave him an evil smile. "Now you have to answer a question for me."

He gave her a dubious look. "What?"

Jade leaned forward, kissing his neck gingerly, avoiding the cuts. "Why did you tell the nurse I was your fiancé?"

He grinned sheepishly at her. "You do plan to marry me, right?"

She pushed against his shoulder. "Are you asking?"

"Sort of."

"Do you plan on marrying me?" She pressed.

"Of course." Beck replied as if it were obvious, which it kind of was. "So we're engaged." He concluded.

Jade raised an eyebrow. "Not really."

"Okay fine." he relented. "When I filed my emergency paperwork when I started driving, I listed you as my fiancé so they'd call you if anything happened to me…" His voice dropped lower. "They don't call girlfriends if you're in a coma." Beck kissed the top of her head.

"I would've found out eventually." Jade commented, easing closer to him, resting her head in its previous place.

"True." Beck agreed. "But I'd hate to see what you'd have cut up before you did."

She knew he was smiling even though she couldn't see his face anymore. "I wouldn't do too much damage." She said.

"Please." He scoffed. "My RV would be in shreds before you found out. Especially if you thought I was avoiding you."

Jade thought this over, shrugging. "Maybe. Or maybe I'd just set it on fire."

"Oh." Beck made a face. "My poor fish." He lamented.

"Those fish are stupid."

"You just don't like them because you think they watch us."

"They do!" Jade insisted. "All the time! They're very perverted little fish!" She relished Beck's deep, rumbling laughter.

"The fish are not the problem."

"Are you believing a bunch of mindless fish over me?"

"Of course not."

"Stop smiling."

"Why?" His smile widened.

"You look ridiculous."

"No, the fact that I am wearing jeans and a hospital gown is ridiculous. The smile is the good part."

"What. Ever."

Beck was surprised they hadn't been shushed yet. Or reprimanded for both of them being in the bed. "I love you my little pyromaniac-fish-hater." He said softly, kissing the top of her head.

"And I love you too you car-crashing filleted Indian."

"Are you ever going to stop it with the 'Indian' thing?"

"You started that one yourself, Aladdin." Jade informed him.

"I thought you'd want to know!" He contested. "And anyway, Aladdin is Arabian."

She just shrugged again. "Doesn't mean you look any less like him."

_Even though you love to insult me and you're loud and you're all the things I thought I'd never love; and even though you don't say it a lot, I know you love me as much as I love you: More than anything._

**I just realized that both my fanfics for Victorious are centered around tragedy…. I am thinking the next one-shot will be happy, yes? Also, I am thinking maybe a chapter in the future will be texting/computer updates/comments? Would anyone like that?**

**Again, I would ADORE some constructive criticism, and I would absolutely LOVE to hear what you thought, no matter what your thoughts about it. **

**Thanks! Much love to all of my readers and reviewers,**

**Aimee**


	3. Pancakes It Is

A/N: Thanks for more amazing reviews everyone! Sorry if the POV changes in the last chapter confused you. This chapter is not texting, sadly, I just couldn't come up with anything yet. But last night around 1:30 AM i had this idea that wouldn't let go of me. SO what did I do? I, like the insane, insomniac writer I am, got out of bed and trudged to the basement, where my computer is, and wrote. I'm not exactly sure if anyone will get the whole present-tense thing. I know that I even wrote the flashback in the present-tense, but let me tell you why. Remember when I said the story wouldn't let me go? Well neither would writing in the present tense. I have never written in the present tense before, so it was weird that I couldn't seem to write in the past tense. So here. Now that I've rambled on way longer than you probably read. I wrote this mostly because I find rain extremely romantic :) Enjoy! Disclaimers: I still don't own Victorious...Or a clock for that matter...Or Jack Johnson's amazing song Banana Pancakes, which you should check out if you haven't already heard it.

Beck's POV

There are many ways to wake up. Like, an alarm clock , for instance, or a kiss from your hot goth girlfriend. But of course, being me and having my impossible life, it was neither of those things that woke me up. No, I woke to someone violently shaking me.

"Jade?" it was still dark outside.

"Listen!" She responds excitedly.

Being the good boyfriend that I am, I do. I squint, trying to figure out what she'd heard. She didn't sound scared, so it couldn't be a _somebody. _She'd sounded….. Excited? I did a double-take. My girlfriend is pushed up on one elbow, watching me expectantly, smiling.

I'm not kidding; she is _smiling._

"What am I supposed to hear?" I ask cautiously.

Jade sighs as if I'm the densest person she'd ever encountered. "The _rain_!"

Now I notice the RV is shaking. I can hear it now. It's deafening, actually, and I can't believe I hadn't noticed it before. The metal of the RV enhances the sound, I guess.

"You like the sound of the rain?" I smile.

"It's pretty, huh?"

"_Pretty_?" I asked incredulously.

"Shut up." Jade commands, laying her head on my chest. "It reminds me of…" she trails off, brushing the tips of her fingers over my abs.

"What?" I press. "What does it remind you of?"

I feel her shake her head. "It doesn't matter."

"Of course it matters!" I counter. "Come on, just tell me. We're in the dark." I point out.

"Fine." She relents begrudgingly. "It reminds me of our first time."

I remember.

_Its raining the day Jade helps me move my stuff into the RV my dad bought. To christen the new place, Jade decides, we need to cook. "Cook what?" I ask._

_Jade thinks this over, then grabs my car keys. "Come on." She says. "We're going to Publix."_

_I follow her out the door. "Why?" I question, letting her drive even though it irks me._

"_Because I hate Wal-Mart." She replies evenly, turning halfway around to back out of the driveway._

"_I meant why are we going shopping?" _

"_Because we need pancake mix."_

"_Pancake mix?" I echo._

_Jade nods. "And bananas."_

"_Bananas?" I'm hopelessly lost._

"_You're a slow one." Jade mumbles._

_I follow Jade's instructions when we get there and get the bananas, meeting her at the checkout counters. "Why do we need bananas **and **pancake mix?" I ask her as she hands the red box to the elderly employee behind the register, not bothering with the conveyor belt.._

"_To make banana pancakes, retardondo." _

"_Why would we make banana pancakes?" _

"_You ask a lot of 'why' questions, you know that?" Jade comments and the woman rings up the bananas. _

"_Just tell me."_

"_We're making them because that's how the song goes." She explains. _

_Now I'm even more confused. "What song?"_

_She stares at me. "Honestly?"_

_When I shake my head, she continues, rolling her eyes. "Cantcha see that it's just raining" she sings, making the cashier look up in surprise at Jade's phenomenal voice. _

_I know what song she's talking about now, and I notice she skips a few lines. "Makin banana pancakes pretend like it's the weekend now,_

"_We can pretend it all the time."_

"_You have a beautiful voice!" the cashier exclaims._

_Jade nods to accept this, handing the woman a couple of bills. The woman smiles affectionately at us and I put my arm around Jade's shoulders. "Ah, young love." The Publix worker says. "So sweet." She hands Jade her change._

_She must have missed the 'retardondo' part of the conversation._

"_Take care, darlings!" The old woman calls after us._

"_Thanks!" I toss back over my shoulder as we walk out the automatic doors._

_I smile at her in the car, reaching over to rub her back. "That song really isn't about pancakes, babe." I say._

_Jade smirks. "I know."_

_Two hours later, I collapse beside Jade on the bed, both of us sighing contentedly. Dirty plates, bowls, spatulas and a pan are in the sink, abandoned. Jade moves closer to me and lays her head on my shoulder. I wrap an arm around hers. "I love you." I say._

"_Obviously." She replies, still out of breath. "And, just as obviously," she adds after a moment. "I love you too."_

_I smile, but then I think about what we'd just done. "Do you regret it?" I ask carefully, hoping I know what the answer is._

"_No." Jade affirms. "Not at all. Do you?"_

_I grin and kiss the top of her head. "Not even a little."_

_She starts to get up. "Where're you going?" I ask almost desperately._

_She smiles sexily at me. "Chill." She says, stepping into her jeans and throwing mine at me. "I don't want to be caught naked by your parents."_

_I'm surprised she has the strength to hook her bra in the back and yank my t-shirt over her head, or that I can pull my jeans up and buckle the belt. We're almost asleep a few minutes later, Jade sprawled over me, my arms around her and our breathing becoming rhythmic. _

"_Jade?" I say, partly testing whether she was awake and partly wanting to say something._

"_Hmm?" she replies sleepily._

"_I really like having my own place."_

"_Me too." She seconds._

_We fall asleep humming Jack Johnson._

I smile and pull Jade close. "That was an amazing day."

"We should make banana pancakes." She says.

I look at the clock. "Babe, it's two-thirty in the morning."

"I know." She says, getting up and turning the lamp on.

I chuckle. "Fine." I say. "Pancakes it is."

So there. :) Like it? TELL ME! Even if you hated it. Which will be sad, but at least I'll know. Oh, and if you're going to tell me you hate it, would you mind telling me why? That way you'll be helpful and not just depressing :) Much Love, Aimee P.S. This may turn into a two-shot, by the way. Is that what a two-chapter story is called? A two-shot? 


	4. Sympathetic: Pancakes It Is Part 2

Hi, this is chapter 2 to Pancakes It Is. I'm not sure I like it, it's kinda random. I included a little Tori/Andre, and that was weird. I'm sorry if this sucks, but I'll try to make the next update better. Thank you everyone for the amazing reviews! There were 29 last time I checked! Reviews make me happy

Disclaimer: I think you've got it by now, I don't own Victorious and I don't own a clock, tragedy. Oh, I don't own Anberlin either

OH! And to my commenter Shakira: :)I don't live in Florida, but I have been there many times. And yes, Publix is a Southern thing. They also have them in South Carolina :) Beck's POV

Jade's making coffee. I'm pretty sure she's the only person who gets up at two in the morning just to make pancakes and coffee, and the thought makes me smile. I come up behind her and kiss her shoulder, snaking my arms around her waist. "Know what?" I ask.

"What?" Jade stirs the pancake batter.

"I'm really glad you're you."

After a moment, she twists around a little to give me a weird look. "You know that makes no sense, right?"

I nod, and she just shakes her head and turns her attention back to the pan on the stove. I pretend I'm not distracted by how adorable she looks in my clothes, because if she asks me what I'm thinking, I'll be murdered for the word 'adorable'. My phone rings, saving me, and Jade shoves the spatula in her hand at me.

"Watch the pancakes." She says, heading over to answer it.

"What should they be doing?" I ask in my most innocent voice.

Jade rolls her eyes. "Instantaneously exploding," she retorts as she digs through the covers, looking for my Anberlin-blasting phone.

"WHY THE HELL IS VEGA CALLING YOU IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT?" She screams.

I'm going to assume that she's found it and read the caller ID.

A thought about telling her it's technically morning passes briefly through my head before I remember that such a proclamation would be suicide. So instead, I just shrug and say, "Find out."

I'll apologize to Tori for Jade tomorrow, because, honestly, I am enjoying Jade's romantic mood way more than I care about Tori Vega's sensitive feelings. That sounds incredibly shallow, doesn't it? I'm sorry, but it's kinda true.

"WHAT ARE YOU FREAKING DOING CALLING MY BOYFRIEND AT TWO IN THE MORNING?" Jade yells at Tori.

She's put it on speaker phone, so I hear Tori when she urgently whispers: "Jade? Oh Jade I'm so glad you answered!"

"What?"

I have to admit, I'm equally astounded. Tori's usually pretty wary of Jade, and anyway, Tori has Jade's number. "I need help!" Tori hisses.

"With what, Vega?" Jade lowers her voice and I'm glad, because I wouldn't have been surprised if my parents heard her and woke up.

"Andre's in my bedroom."

"And that's a bad thing why?" I interject, flipping a pancake.

Jade's beside me now, and she doesn't seem nearly as angry as she was a moment ago. "Because!" Tori wails in a whisper. "He wants to…and I'm…" she falters, then stops, speaking so softly I can barely hear her. "Jade, I'm scared."

What happens next is astonishing, seriously, prepare yourself for what I'm about to tell you: Jade sighs, but not in an annoyed way, then commands, "Vega, cool it." in a voice that I will swear until the day I die is sympathetic.

_Sympathetic. _Wow.

"If you don't want to, don't. Andre will understand, just stop freaking out."

Tori murmurs something else than I don't hear because Jade's turned off the speaker phone. I hear Jade talking her out of whatever hysterics she's in. "Yes, the first few times." She confirms, and I sort of wish I didn't know what she was talking about.

"Stop crying." Jade commands Tori. "Tell him no…Okay, then tell him yes…if you say that again, I will hang up on you."

I smile and pile the pancakes on a plate. She would hang up too, it's her favorite things about phones. She can shut people up at the touch of a button, and she enjoys it immensely.

"Okay, have fun…" Jade mumbles something that sounds like 'good luck' that Tori probably didn't hear, but I'm proud of Jade for the effort anyway.

She hangs up, and I feel her rest her forehead against my back. "I swear she is so stupid." Jade mutters.

"As I recall," I counter, "You weren't all that fearless our first time either."

"No, that was you."

"Me?" I turn around and hug her. "I think it was you."

Jade scoffs. "I wasn't the one who kept asking if I was sure."

"I didn't want you to regret it!"

Jade shrugs, wrapping her arms around my waist. "All the stopping and starting, geez you were being such a girl."

"Please, if I hadn't you'd be calling me a jerk right now." I retort.

"That's…" she stops to think about it before relenting. "That's probably true."

"My you're feeling nice tonight." I say as Jade pulls away and puts the plate of pancakes on a card table that serves as our kitchen table.

She shoots me an evil glare. "It's technically morning." she yanks open a drawer and rummages around for forks, adding, "Don't push it."

I smile and kiss her temple. "Of course not."

I think about those movie shots as we sit there, eating pancakes and listening to the rain. You know which ones I'm talking about? The ones where the camera slowly pans out to show you the outside of whatever building the actors are in. I imagine that if a camera were to pan out from the RV, you would see the big metal thing on wheels, light pouring out of the windows (even though they're bullet proof), and the rain, falling to make the beautiful, rhythmic pounding sounds on the roof of my 'house', and making my tough-girl girlfriend smile at me, unabashedly, and happily.

A/N: I decided to make the texts/computer updates thing into it's own story, so if you were one of the people who said they would like to read that, it's called Promise Me We Will Never Be That Lame. It's rated M, but that's just because I'm super paranoid and it mentions sex A LOT. So there, you're warned.

Hope you liked it! and if you have any suggestions or ideas for one-shots you'd like me to write, just let me know!

REVIEW!

Thanks!


	5. Because She Still Intoxicates Me

Sorry almost all my chapters so far are from Beck's perspective, but the next chapter will be Jade's POV. So this is a future fic about Jade picking out a wedding dress. Enjoy! Disclaimer: I think it's pretty obvious I don't own Victorious

Our moms, various cousins I couldn't name, my one female cousin, Cat, and finally, me. We are all sitting on a long couch in a bridal store, supposedly _helping _Jade pick out a wedding dress. Although, at the moment, none of us are doing a whole lot of helping.

Jade's mom is frowning. "But Jade," She said disapprovingly. "It's _black_."

Jade takes a deep breath, and I imagine she's trying not to make a comment about her mother being colorblind. "Yes, Mom." She finally says. "Yes it is."

Jade's in a long, black, slightly fluffy dress that has no sleeves. She looks amazing, but I don't dare interfere in the face off going on. I feel like marrying her right now.

My own mother makes a strangled face. "But aren't you worried about what," she hesitates. "What kind of, ehem, adverse light a black wedding dress might cast you in?"

Jade, as well as she's been behaving, can't help but roll her eyes. "No, as you may already know, Mrs. Oliver, I really don't care what people think about me."

I want to help her, but I don't know what to say or do, short of kicking them all out. But that probably wouldn't work out too well, because, as the employee told me when we walked it, I wasn't even supposed to _be _here. Presumably because I was the fiancé, and apparently, the fiancé isn't as important as the dress.

"_I thought the fiancé wasn't supposed to see the dress before the wedding." I said when Jade asked me to come with her._

"_I don't care," She'd replied. "I need you to come so my family doesn't eat me alive." She pulled on shirt. "Not to mention your mother."_

_ I smiled at her from my place sitting on her bed. "Say that again."_

_ She shot me a weird look. "Say what again?"_

"_ The part about needing me."_

_She shook her head. "You're ridiculous."_

_ Jade's gotten better over the years, but she's still the same Jade. Evidence of this often appears, especially around Tori Vega. Even after three years of knowing her, Jade still hated Tori to a certain extent, but now it was kind of funny. High school seems to magnify things like that._

"_Please?" I begged as she shoved something in her purse. _

_She rolled her eyes. "Honestly, Beck."_

_I caught her hand as she walked by. "Say you need me." I said like she used to in high school._

"_Don't steal my line." Jade grumbled, but I didn't let her go._

_I stuck out my lower lip and she sighed heavily, but dropped her purse. She straddled my lap and pressed a kiss to my cheek, my lips, my neck. "Beck," she murmured sexily. "I need you."_

"_Good," I answered, and it took everything in me to keep my voice sounding normal._

_It was hard to sound perfectly fine when she was on top of me. "I need you too."_

_She pushed me down on the bed, laying herself against me and kissing my collar bone. "Beck?" she said again, and I could feel her teeth on my skin when she spoke. "Will you come with me?"_

_It was difficult to pay attention to what she wass saying, and somewhere, subconsciously, I knew that was her intent. "Sure Babe, I'll go."_

_Jade slid off of me and stood up, giving me a peck on the cheek. "Thanks."_

"_Jade!" I moan._

"_Let's get going, Beck!" _

_I threw my arm over my eyes. "You are very evil."_

_She took my hands and pulled me off the bed. "I know."_

So yeah, I'm here because I'm weak. And because no matter how many times I've slept with Jade in the four years we've been together, she still has the power to intoxicate me very quickly and with little effort. I assume this will be the reason she wins arguments until the day I die, but at least I'll go happily.

"I think you look pretty, Jadey!" Cat exclaims.

Jade offers the ghost of a smile, obviously deciding to ignore the 'Jadey' part. "Thanks, Cat." She says, but goes back into the dressing room anyway.

The little brown-headed attendant comes out after a moment and motions to me. "She needs you." she says.

I smile as I stand up and open the door, leaving the employee outside. I know Jade needs me.

Jade almost looks like she's going to cry. "This is so lame!" she hisses.

"I know." I say. "They're burning holes in my head with their eyes."

She pokes me. "I gave you the chance to ditch all this crap." She points out. "I told you we should elope."

I remember that. "Beck," she'd whined when we started talking about the wedding. "Why do we have to involve them at all? Let's just run off to somewhere tropical and tell them when we get back."

"Because." I'd countered. "They'd hate us forever if we did that. Especially our moms."

She'd fought for eloping at every decision, but I'd won in the end. I think.

I hug her tightly. "I know you love black, but is there any particular reason you have to have a black wedding dress?"

She glares evilly at me. "You don't remember?"

I wrack my brain, trying to figure out what she's talking about. "No…" I say slowly.

She sighs exaggeratedly. "Two years ago, when we were in high school, I told everyone on The Slap that I was going to be married in a black wedding dress." She stops to look at me pointedly. "I haven't changed my mind."

I smile. "I do remember that. I also recollect that you wanted to get married in Hawaii so you could throw anyone that objects in a volcano."

"Well that hasn't changed either, but you just had to have a traditional wedding."

I kiss her ear. "I'm sorry." I say. "But look on the bright side, we won't have any objectors."

Jade scoffs. "I'm not so sure. You did insist on inviting your mom."

I chuckle. "She's the reason we haven't eloped in Hawaii."

"Or she could be the reason we're going to elope in Hawaii."

I decide to change the subject. "So you want black, and you're sure. Does it really matter what they think?" I question.

She buries her head in my shoulder. "We have to deal with them for the rest of our lives." She says despairingly.

I smile. "That doesn't mean they have to be appeased."

She rolls her eyes. "You were the one that said that if we don't have a somewhat traditional wedding, we'll be barbequed by the families."

"I did say that, didn't I?" I look at our reflection in the mirror. "But I also said _somewhat_."

Jade fits perfectly in my arms, and for the millionth time I want to tell her 'yes.' Because, in truth, I really wouldn't mind eloping with her. If it wouldn't mean our assassination.

"This is lame." Jade reiterates.

"I'm sorry." I apologize again.

"Kiss me?"

I gladly oblige. "Feel better?" I ask.

She turns around and starts unzipping the dress. "After we're married, I will." She growls.

I unzip it the rest of the way and help Jade step out. She smirks when I stare at her, my eyes running up and down her body. "Should I leave?" I query.

Jade shrugs. "If you must. But hey," she grabs my hand. "Help me out with those vultures."

I nod and kiss the tip of her nose. "I will."

"You'd better." She mutters. "I didn't just bring you for the moral support."

I sit back down and wait for her to come out. "Is she okay?" Cat asks, fairly bouncing in her seat. "All this waiting is _hard_!"

I pat her knee. "She's fine, Cat. She'll be out in a second."

And she is, in another black dress. This one is a little shorter, strapless again, and doesn't flare out like the other one did. It's got little jewels all over the top and the way her long black curls tumble over her shoulders make her look just like I'd imagined she would when we got married.

"Jade." Her mother moans. "Honestly, with the black."

Her cousins and my mother cluck their own censure. This time I know just what to say. "You know," I lean forward. "I'm just a guy, but should it be Jade's decision?"

They all stare at me. "I mean, you're the one who has to wear the dress," I look at my fiancé. "If that's the dress you want to be married in, then that's the dress you should choose."

Jade lets a genuine smile slip. "So you like it?"

"You take my breath away, Jade." I say.

"Aww!" Cat exclaims.

"Well yeah, Beck, I was talking about the dress." She says caustically, but she hasn't stopped smiling.

"The dress is beautiful." I amend.

Jade steps off the stage and leans over, kissing me quickly. "Thank you." she says, returning to the changing room and slamming the door before anyone else can say a word.

Geez I love her.

A/N: It would make me ridiculously happy if you would review and tell me what you thought! 


	6. Line Thief

Okay... I kind of scared myself with this. Yeah... I debated all night last night about whether to publish this or just let it rot on my flash drive for the rest of my life. Obviously, I decided to go with the former. I AM WARNING YOU! THIS IS A BIT M! Just for some stuff Jade does to torture Beck, and some heavier cursing than I've previously included.

So, just for good measure: **This chapter is bordering on M! **

There. I am sincerely sorry for this. There's nothing graphic, actually in that respect it's pretty mild, it's just that the innuendo is bursting at the seams.

Disclaimer: Yeah, yeah. Don't own it. I kind of wish I didn't own the story either...

* * *

><p>Jade kicked my door open. Again. I swear, the next time she does it I'm going to make her help me get the dents out of it.<p>

Yeah… We'll see how that goes.

After Ally left, I turned the sound off on my laptop and turned it around while I called Jade down. She yelled. A lot. But then, that was Jade; yell until she's hoarse and then let me console her. "Jade, honestly, I just wanted you to understand how ridiculous you were being-"

"RIDICULOUS?"

Bad choice of words, huh?

"I am NOT the ridiculous one here! I swear it's like I'm the only one who cares if we stay together!"

This is when I decided that the only way I'll ever get her to listen to me is to grab her and kiss her. So I do. She's midsentence, screaming something about Alyssa Vaughn and cupcakes (How those two things go together, I'll never know) when I reach for her and pull her up roughly to my chest, kissing her hard on the lips.

"You know, making out doesn't solve _everything _Beck." She says snippily when I let her go.

I smirk. "Don't be so sure."

Jade rolls her eyes. "You're such a child."

"I know you wouldn't have me any other way." I say, and then launch into my (shorter than normal) post-fight speech, adapted for the particular situation. "Listen to me for a sec, 'kay?" I take her chin in my hand and angle her face towards me. "Don't think so little of me that you'd worry about me dating a cheerleader over you. I love _you_, no one else."

She gives me a doubtful look. "Besides," I continue. "Cheerleaders annoy me."

Now she lets a smirk of her own slip. "So, let me finish this project, and then it'll just be the two of us." I entice her, leaning closer to kiss her neck. "We can do whatever you want."

"Whatever I want." She repeats as I leave a hickey on her neck.

What? I can't help myself. No matter how exasperating my girlfriend can get, her screaming still turns me on. That's so twisted, isn't it? Whatever.

She glares at me when I pull away, but I just give her a smile and turn the computer back around, turning the sound on. I sit Indian style in front of it and tug my girlfriend down with me. "Sorry, Tori. Let's get the script done."

Tori looks surprised that Jade, who's settling her head in my lap, is still here and my face is still intact, but she recovers nicely. We write a few more paragraphs, and now that Andre's found another computer, he and Tori are talking about a kid getting his face ripped off by his closet. Or something. It it's hard to concentrate, because Jade's head is starting to move in my lap.

It was probably a mistake to let her lay there.

"Jade." I mutter under my breath.

She stops moving obediently. Weird… "So Beck, what should the kid find in the thing his closet sucks him into?" Tori asks.

"Um, I don't know, maybe a…" I try to think straight, but Jade's tracing the inseam of my jeans, starting at my knee and travelling up, up… "An ogre!" I yell, trying to breathe normally.

Andre gives me a strange look. "Okay…"

"What does an ogre look like?" Tori asks. "You know, the ogres that aren't green and friendly and Shrek?"

"Shrek wasn't really friendly." I tell Tori as Jade's fingertip goes back to my knee. "But it doesn't matter." I add when Tori's face falls.

"Maybe this one's green too," Andre puts in. "But not like Shrek green."

I tilt the laptop's webcam upward so only the top of Jade's head can be seen by Tori and Andre. Because Andre will probably catch on soon, and he'll never let me forget about it. He's explaining what color green the ogre should be when Jade starts tracing patterns on my thigh. "You know, Andre, maybe it should just be orange instead." Tori says.

"Tor, ogres can't be orange." He retorts as if it should be obvious.

I give him a strange look. "Well, you know, 'cause ogres are supposed to be all…" He does some weird, jerking movement. "And then all…"

He stops when He notices the look on Tori's face matches mine. "Nevermind." He decides.

I feel Jade roll over, and then little pokes just below my belt. "Jade!" I hiss.

I don't dare look down, because the minute I do, I'm going to see her little pink tongue trying to torture me (even though it's not so difficult at the moment), and I'm going to lose it. I'd sit up and grab her. Then Tori and Andre will forever be scarred. And that kid in the closet with the ogre is never going to see the ending of his script.

Jade flips back over. "Beck."

"You're killing me, Babe." I tell her quietly, forgetting Tori and Andre.

Jade smirks evilly. "Sorry." She says, though it's evident she's nothing of the kind.

I make as stern a face as I can muster at her, and turn my attention back to the script and not getting an 'F'. But Andre's already chuckling. "You okay there, man?"

"Shut up. Decide on a color for the ogre." I command him.

Tori appears a little confused, and I'm glad she doesn't know what's going on. "Um, I'm just gonna ignore whatever's happening to Beck and say the ogre's dark green and describe him as 'menacing'."

"Sounds good." I give her a thumbs up with one hand, and grab both of Jade's wandering ones with the other.

I glare at Jade, but she smiles back sweetly. I wrestle a bracelet off of my wrist and slip it over both of Jade's hands, tightening it to keep them tied together. Unfortunately, Andre again notices as Tori types and laughs hysterically. Tori's head snaps up.

"Okay, what is wrong with you two?" she demands.

"You mean what's wrong with them two?" Andre corrects.

I put my free hand over my eyes. "Nothing is wrong with anyone! Just finish typing up what we've got so far, Tori."

Andre keeps laughing. "There is a little wrong with _something_."

I glower at him. "I'll choke you with your broken guitar strings." I threaten.

Jade laughs like she's proud of me. It's not my fault I'm acting like my less-than-pleasant girlfriend! This Andre's doing. He just had to mention the whole 'cheerleader' thing. Even if Ally Smithton is nine.

Jade turns her face to look at our friends, so I take the opportunity to lean down and whisper in her ear. "And I'll tie _you_ to the bed until this script is finished if you don't behave yourself."

Again. Bad choice of threat.

Jade's eyes widen, ostensibly intrigued by the idea. "You will?" She asks.

"Oh my gosh." I sit back up. "I can't believe you."

She chuckles. "What? It sounds like a great idea."

It kind of does, but I'm sure as Wisconsin not going to give her the satisfaction of knowing I think so.

The scene has come to the boy and his mother reasoning with a (dark) green (menacing) ogre, and I calm down. Jade's behaving well, for the most part. Except for one crack about Tori's face resembling the ogre she described. But she gets bored, apparently, at the part where the boy gets carried off by the ogre, because she inclines her head to her right and pokes me with her tongue. I'm able to mostly ignore her though, consoling myself with the thought that the homework is almost done. I do keep a firm hold on her bound hands, just in case.

"Maybe the mother could throw something at the- HOLY CRAP!" My body jerks forward, and I yank Jade up to a sitting position.

I mute the laptop again, growling out a "Just a sec," at my friends before turning off the webcam.

"JADELYN AUGUST WEST!" I stare at her incredulously. "You bit me!"

Seriously?

Her blue eyes sparkle mischievously. "Please, Beck. You're such a drama queen. I just nipped at you a little."

I sit down and take her hands. "Ten minutes! I need ten minutes, and then we can do whatever the fuck you want." I promise pleadingly.

Sorry, sex makes me curse.

Jade gazes at me with feigned innocence. "Will you tie me up?"

"Holy shit yes." I grumble. "And do unspeakable things."

Sorry again.

She grins. "Okay. Ten minutes."

She obediently sits down beside me, tenting her legs over mine and resting her head on my shoulder as I flip everything back on. "Sorry." I apologize to them.

Andre's crying, he's laughing so hard. "Did… did she just… bite you?" he asks through his hysteria.

I really hope his grandma and Tori's sister aren't paying attention. Not like either of them would really care, but still.

Tori's eyes are bulging. "Jade bit you?" Her face is crimson.

"Both of you focus on the script!" I yell at them.

"Alright, alright. Chill." Tori grumbles, hanging her head. "Snippy."

Cat rejoins our chat to help with the last of the script, which I'm thankful for, because she momentarily takes the focus off of me. Jade doesn't care, her eyes are on her phone, and I have to say I'm kind of impressed that she can text with her hands tied together like that. "Your neck's red, Jadey!" Cat squeals.

Shit.

"Yup." She replies and Tori's face returns to its previous shamefully scarlet color.

I guess it's a small condolence that Cat doesn't know where the red came from, but Andre's flipping _giggling _by now. "Can we just say it was all a dream and end this?" I beg them.

"Well…" Tori says as if she's unsure.

"Come on, Tor," Andre convinces her. "Let's put poor Beckett out of his misery."

"Fine." She relents. "I'll type that up. See you guys tomorrow." She thanks us and clicks out of the chat.

We say our goodbyes and I hang up as Andre tries to fit in a: "Have fun, man." And a stupid chortle before I can. He wins. But who cares? It's not Andre who promised to tie his girlfriend up.

I stand up and bring Jade with me. "You do know you are worse at waiting than a five year old, right?" I accuse while I pick her up and lay her down on the bed.

My beautiful girlfriend grins. "But you wouldn't have me any other way."

"Line thief." I mutter as my lips crash against hers.

* * *

><p>Yeah. Again. Sorry.<p>

Review if you have it in you.

~Calvin Munro


	7. Morning Sex

HELLLLOOOO! Look who decided to double post this chizz today.

Short FF about Sikowitz's class with some Beck/Jade morning fluff. Fun. I'm truly sorry if this majorly sucks, but my life's about to hit the fan in a shitty way, so cut me a little slack, K? Thanks. That's why I love you people.

Oh, I know I'm slowly becoming notorious for my ridiculously long A/Ns, but I'd just like to thank everyone who read and reviewed this. You all make me happy and deserve cookies and unicorns and rainbows and other Cat-like things.

So yeah, I hope at least a few of you get some giggles out of this. I don't know why I've been on such a sex kick lately, dang. You dear readers seem to like it though, and you all seem okay with having to forgive me over and over again.

Disclaimer: Is this really necessary? I don't own Vitorious or anything else recognizable. There, thanks for deepening my depressed mood.

* * *

><p>"Ugh! Would someone turn off the sun!" Beck throws an arm over his eyes.<p>

"They're called curtains, Beck." I say, rolling my eyes.

"I _had _curtains." He complains. "Until you shredded them with your scissors."

"If you hadn't answered the phone when _she _called I wouldn't have had to destroy them!" I retort, getting up.

It's true. I wouldn't have murdered those hideous things if he hadn't talked to her. Well, I probably wouldn't have anyway. They _were _pretty hideous...

Two arms snake around my waist and pull me back down. "Don't leave." My boyfriend begs, his lips against my ear.

"Don't be such a pansy." I scold him even though the begging is more than a little sexy. "We're going to be late for school."

"You hate school." He mutters.

"Beck, let go." I command him, because if he doesn't stop it with all the sexy whispering I'm gonna give in and be _way _late for Sikowitz's class.

"Please?"

"No."

"Please?" He fingers the edge of my cami.

"Give me one good reason." I counter.

Damn. He's just too good; he's almost got me. Not that I'd ever let him know that.

Beck chuckles and his lips ghost over my neck. "Because you like morning sex."

I like any kind of sex with Beck, but that's not something to think about when I'm trying not to give in. Because if I do, then he wins, and Jade West wasn't the one who called the shots. And that, little readers is _never _a good thing.

* * *

><p>Yeah... So let's not admit that he won and I let him do me before we left for school. Because it totally didn't happen. As long as no one says a word. I feel like I should remind you that if you do say anything, I will retaliate in a way that will make you sad for a <em>looong <em>time.

"Beck. Jade. You're late." Sikowitz announces as we walk in and take a seat in the back.

Our teacher takes a sip from the pink straw he's shoved in his coconut. "Get on the stage and give me a good explanation."

I shrug and join a small gaggle of kids on the stage. "Beck wanted morning sex."

The expressions on my so-called _classmates_' faces are hilarious, but the blush on Beck's is priceless. "Jade!" he protests. "You didn't have to tell them that!"

I shrug again, laughing internally at the crimson of Vega's hideous face. "It was your fault we were late."

"Didn't hear you complaining." he mutters.

I can't help but smirk. Actually, I did complain a little at first because I was a few missed days away from suspension, but I'm not going to say that to our already shell-shocked class. At least not until Beck follows up his little statement with: "All I heard was squealing."

"I do_ not _squeal." I insist, sending him an evil glare.

"And moaning."

"Shut up!"

"And screaming."

"Beck!" I cover his mouth with my hand.

Beck grins and his muffled reply can still be easily heard through my hand. "Yep, it sounded a bit like that."

I slap him across the face, but he just keeps smiling. But I did leave a red hand print on his cheek. Good. He deserves it. Sort of.

"Thank you, Jade and Beck for letting us in on your sex life." Sikowitz cuts in as if he's not an adult who should probably be concerned that two of his sixteen year old students get more action than he does. "Now, you're all partying Hospice patients!"

Wow. My life is a joke.

* * *

><p>So yeah. That sucked. Sorry, you people deserve better than that. I'll try harder next time.<p>

Happy Early Thanksgiving!

~Calvin Munro

P.S. If you like the double posting, review and I just may do it again. This one was won for you by tsttoain, GABGM, lizandavanforever3, and mitzyspain, who all left reviews that made my terrible day better :)

Shitty Prize, huh?


	8. Nightmares

Sooo, this is weird...However, I find it at least a little enjoyable.

Oh, and sorry for ANOTHER ridiculously long Author's Note, but honestly, this needs to be done. You guys make me laugh sooo much! Here I was so embarrassed about my recent sex kick with these one-shots and I got at least three reviews telling me they were your favorite ones yet! You're all a bunch of perverts! Just kidding, I mean that in the fondest way. I am too sometimes :)

So this one has sex in it too. Not a lot, just enough to tease you. However, for your very bad little minds I will soon post some quite sexy chapters. Just for you :)

Disclaimer: yada yada yada, I don't own anything recognizable. Like Victorious. Or the French. Yeah.

Oh and this one is for Caralynne, because I am honored that she enjoyed my story. I enjoy hers: Who Said I Stopped, immensely. So you should definitely check that out.

* * *

><p>Usually, when she wakes up shaking from the dreams, I pretend not to notice the horror coursing through her. Because if I say something, she'll either deny it or get mad at me. Possibly both. But I can't ignore screaming.<p>

I hear it before I open my eyes. Jade lurches into a sitting position, screaming at the top of her lungs. "Jade?" I sit up next to her.

I don't think she can hear me. "Jade! Jade! Are you okay?" I grasp both her wrists.

I don't think my girlfriend even knows she's yelling. She looks at me with terror in her eyes, like she has no idea who I am. It takes a moment, but eventually, she seems to realize what's happening, and she shuts up.

I pull her close and hold her; her deep, shuddering breaths almost as loud as the screeching. "Are you okay?" I ask again after her breathing gets a little more normal, tilting back slightly to look at her.

She nods. "I… I think so."

Jade falls out of my arms and slumps against the pillows. "Just a dream." She says, more to herself than to me.

"You sure?" I lay beside her, staring at her intently.

"I'm fine, Beck." She snaps.

I kiss her bare shoulder. "Okay."

I don't know what the nightmare was about, but Jade was obviously terrified by it. She'll probably never tell me, but I wish I knew. It's hard to comfort someone when you don't know what they're scared of.

I remember the way she looked at me: as if she'd never seen me before. It was unnerving. I move forward and take her into my arms again. "Jade?"  
>"I don't want to talk about it." she asserts.<p>

"Come on." I say, climbing over her and pulling her out of bed with me.

"What the hell? What are you doing?" She asks.

"Just come."

* * *

><p>I make coffee while Jade sits on the bar stool in her kitchen, still perplexed. "When are you going to tell me why you're making French toast?"<p>

I turn around and lean against the granite countertop, waiting for the French toast to get brown. "When we were younger, my mom was convinced that French toast cured bad dreams. " I began. "Often when I or one of my sisters would wake up in the middle of the night, she dragged us downstairs and made French toast. Sometimes we'd tell her about the dream, or the reason we couldn't sleep, or sometimes we'd just talk with her, or even sit in silence."

"Your mom got out of bed and made you French toast when you woke up in the middle of the night." Jade clarifies as if she can't quite believe it.

I nod, flipping a piece of toast in the pan. "She worked the night shift as a hospital receptionist when she was in law school, and it kind of made her an insomniac."

Jade looks baffled, like she can't wrap her mind around it and I can understand why. Jade's mom isn't really around; and when she is, she's not exactly attentive. My girlfriend probably doesn't have any memories of her mother like I do.

"Usually, Mom made hot chocolate to go with it, but I figured you'd rather have coffee." I pour coffee into a blue mug and hand it to her,

Jade's head is cocked to one side. "This is weird." She finally says.

I smile. "Yep, but weird is definitely more fun."

* * *

><p>"How does French toast remedy bad dreams?" Jade asks when we're both at the table her family barely uses.<p>

I shrug. "I have no idea, but it always seemed to work when I was a kid."

She still looks slightly shell-shocked, but she doesn't seem to mind the randomness of the night. "Alright, well then answer me this: why is it that we have the best times over breakfast foods at strange times of the day?"

I smile. "I'm not sure. Why is it that breakfast foods usually end in us having sex?" I question.

"We're really weird." She finally decides.

I agree with a nod. "But I don't think I'd want to be normal."

Jade shakes her head. "Me either."

* * *

><p>We somehow end up curled up in the middle of the floor at three in the morning. "Jade?" I whisper.<p>

"Yeah?"

"I think we just had sex on your kitchen floor." I realize.

In a rare moment, Jade starts to laugh. "Mmhmm. I think so."

I can't help but laugh along with her, because it's kind of ridiculous. "We have some serious problems."

"Definitely." She says wearily.

I can't believe that she can honestly fall asleep on the kitchen floor, but somehow she manages it, and soon I'm carrying her back to bed. "Hey Beck?" She murmurs when I lay her down and climb in beside her.

I thought she was asleep. "Yeah?" I wrap my arms around her waist.

"Sorry you didn't get any sleep tonight."

I chuckle. "That's okay. You're worth it."

And she is. Jade West is worth waking up to screaming. She's worth sleepless nights spent eating French toast and having sex on the floor. And she's worth everything I can possibly give her and more.

Even if those things are just coffee and tons of sex. I feel like maybe there should be a smiley face there, because I find it funny that that's okay with Jade. She'll have me; breakfast foods, cheesy jokes and all.

So, in short, we're weird. Breakfast food turns us on and bad dreams end in sex. Yeah, all things Andre should probably never find out about.

* * *

><p>So... Yeah... Sorry about that.<p>

Review and tell me what you think!

And if you have any suggestions or ideas for future one-shots just let me know in your review or a PM

Much Love,

~Calvin Munro


	9. What I Do Best

A/N: Sorry this is so short, but I thought I'd be nice and give you something to hold you over until I get a few longer chapters written.

This is super pointless fluff.

* * *

><p><strong>Jade's POV<strong>

A warm hand touches my lower back, waking me up. I don't mind too much, it feels good against my cold skin. It feels even better when the hand grips my hip and gently pulls me until my back rests alongside an equally warm chest.

Beck nibbles on my ear and I wonder absentmindedly what happened to the covers.

"Jade?" He says.

I ignore him. He always holds me like this before he gets up the courage to tell me I have to get up. I keep my eyes closed as I always do in protest, holding my body a little rigidly just in case he decides to get up and make me come with him.

"Guess what?" He persists.

"What?" I mumble miserably.

Beck kisses the pulse point behind my ear, announcing in a whisper: "It's Saturday."

I relax, letting him tighten his arms around my waist. "So you're telling me you woke me up to tell me I don't have to wake up?" I confirm.

I should be mad. I'm Jade West. I don't take anyone's crap. But somehow, I'm not.

"Yes." My boyfriend's low chuckle sounds delicious. "I'm sorry."

His fingers play across my bare hips. "I'm sure you'll find some way to make it up to me." I challenge.

Beck starts to slip his fingers into my underwear, but I catch his hand, bringing it up to my lips and turning in his arms, finally opening my eyes. "After you let me sleep a little longer."

He sighs. "Fine." But he's still smiling.

I sit up a bit to tug the covers from the end of my bed over us, settling back in to enjoy the warmth. I toss a leg over Beck's waist to bring myself closer and kiss his bare chest. His eyes slide shut for a second. "Now you're just being mean." He accuses.

I lift my lips to his, whispering after a moment: "It's what I do best."

* * *

><p>AGAIN! REVIEW AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK AND WHAT YOU"D LIKE TO SEE IN LATER CHAPTERS!<p>

Thanks :)

Much Love,

~Calvin Munro


	10. I Could Be Nicer

Hey everybody :) I know I made it sound like it'd be awhile until the next update, but I got some inspiration. I hope this isn't too terrible. I"m sorry if it doesn't live up to your expectations.

Thank you everyone for your sweet reviews, you're all amazing in my book :)

* * *

><p>She heaves another sigh, and my book rises and falls with her stomach. "When are you going to be finished studying?" she asks.<p>

I chuckle and shake my head, bending down to whisper in her ear. "Perhaps if you weren't such an amazing distraction I'd be done by now."

Jade rolls her eyes. "So you're calling me a distraction?"

I kiss her ear. "Yes. Very much so."

She smirks. "Good."

My girlfriend is laying across my lap, her head on one of my knees and her lower back on the other. My history book lays open on her stomach, her feet planted on the floor. Her own textbook is resting on her knees where she can't see it; she's doing a great job of keeping us both from getting any homework done.

Her fingers play with the corners of the book, waiting until I've zoned out enough to turn the pages. "Jade!"

She laughs, grinning innocently. "Yes?"

"Stop it!" I growl, hoping my expression doesn't betray my amusement.

I turn three pages back to where I was supposed to be reading about American Government. "I can't believe we're alone in an empty house and all you do is homework." Jade laments.

Actually, I think I'm doing a great job of controlling myself. My neighbors (not Ally, the people on the other side) asked Jade and I to house sit this week, so we've upgraded from RV to giant-ass house. It's nice, but not exactly conducive to schoolwork.

"Maybe if you'd put some clothes on, it would be easier to concentrate." I hiss in her ear.

She sighs exaggeratedly and stands up, unceremoniously dropping the book in my lap in her place. She pulls a black shirt from her bag and I close my eyes, but it doesn't help. I can still see her standing there in her bra and underwear, long, gorgeous legs, slim body; black curls cascading down her back. She's reaching into the bag again and I just can't take it.

"If you put another layer of clothing on, you might as well kill me." I give in.

What can I say? I'm a sucker for this girl.

Jade turns around and quirks an eyebrow. "Oh yeah? I thought you needed to study." She smiles evilly.

I glare at her. "I do. You just make it very difficult." I stand up and put my hands on her hips, pulling her close. "And somehow," I murmur against her lips. "You always get what you want."

I can feel her smile widen. "It seems to happen often, doesn't it?"

"Mmm, I think I'm seeing a trend here."

"Yeah? What's that?" she kisses me, standing on her tiptoes.

"I start doing homework," I stop to kiss her. "You show up," I stick my tongue out and lick her lips. "You end up getting laid, and I end up with no homework done."

Out tongues fight back and forth, neither of us thinking about homework now. Not that Jade ever was. She chuckles. "It's a good kind of trend."

I should probably protest this, pull away and finish the required reading, but the only thing I find myself actually doing is dragging Jade to the giant bed and pulling her on top of me. I think back to that script I had to write with Tori, Andre and Cat a month or so ago. I'm pretty sure that ended just about the same way.

I flip us over and go for Jade's neck. She lets a soft gasp slip and it just seals the fact that nothing school-related will get done tonight. I slowly inch her shirt up, deciding to pay her back some for the torture she loves to inflict on me.

"You know everyone's going to see those hickeys there." Jade admonishes in a breathless voice.

So, so, so ridiculously sexy.

"God I hope so." I mumble, finally losing my patience (if it was ever there) and all but rip her shirt off her body.

I push her further into the bed and press my lips to her collarbone, trailing kisses down her chest. Tracing my fingers down her pale sides and feeling the scars running across her abdomen, I'm glad she's here with me and not at home. Jade pushes my flannel shirt off my shoulders and I sit up long enough to yank it off and toss it onto the floor. My undershirt quickly follows, and then her fingers are curled around my belt loops, trying to pull me closer. Her grip on me helps us move in a rhythmic pattern, and I suddenly realize that we have an enormous house all to ourselves.

This is going to be an amazing night. Homework-less, but nonetheless amazing.

"You know," Jade muses as she falls into bed and curls up into me. "Maybe I should think about being nicer."

"What?" I knew she was in a good mood, but I didn't know it was _that _good.

She slaps at me playfully. "I mean, you were being nice when you offered to house sit for these neighbors while they were gone, and look where it got us."

I laugh. Of course. "You think that offering to be paid to live in a gigantic house for a week is nice?"

She shrugs. "I wouldn't have offered."

"True." I hug her shoulders.

Maybe she isn't the nicest, but that's what makes Jade, Jade. "You tired?" I ask her.

"A little. Why?"

I smirk even though, with the way we're laying, she can't see it. "Did you see that giant shower?"

* * *

><p>Yeah... Well, maybe you got some enjoyment out of that.<p>

You know what to do

Much Love,

~Calvin Munro


	11. Stuck on You

I"M ALIVE! This sucks, but at least I updated :). Sorry for taking so long, but I acquired a boyfriend, got forbade (ha ha, forBADE) to see him, dumped him, and now he won't leave me alone. All in the last five weeks. So yeah. Enjoy this crappy update and thank you all for your AMAZING reviews :)

* * *

><p>Sikowitz isn't here. It's actually one of very few times I've wished he was. It is his class, after all.<p>

We're all in our normal positions: Jade barely awake in the chair next to mine, her head on my shoulder and my arms around her. Tori's beside Andre, and Cat and Robbie are talking about… well, truthfully, I'm kind of afraid to ask what they're talking about. The rest of the class is just hanging around, wondering, I'm sure, where our very, very strange teacher is.

That's another scary place for my mind to go. Stealing coconuts from people's houses, climbing in every interesting-looking window in town, digging through dumpsters for clothes-

Tori's voice cuts into my thoughts. "Beck?"

"Yeah, hmm? Sorry."

She looks amused at my absentmindedness. "I was just saying I didn't know you had a tattoo."

I hold up my left arm so she can see the black ink on the inside of my wrist. "It's an anchor."

Tori raises her eyebrows. "Why an anchor?"

I pick up my girlfriend's left hand and hold it out for Tori to see the matching anchor on Jade's wrist. I'm surprised she doesn't get mad at me. Maybe she's asleep…

"Her friend the tattoo artist thought it'd be a nice way to congratulate Jade on finding someone who can be her anchor." I say as an explanation, rolling my eyes.

The little Latina still looks confused. "Just tell her the story, man." Andre advises. "It's pretty entertaining."

"Wanna hear it?" I ask.

"Just tell it!" Jade snaps.

And here I thought she was asleep.

"_So you're coming to that party, right?" Andre asked._

_We were standing in front of my locker, still trying to get used to high school. Of course, getting used to Hollywood Arts was much harder than regular high school. It was good that we had a little group already. Andre, me, Cat, Robbie-_

"_Beck!" _

_And Jade. Can't forget Jade._

"_Jade!" I turned around and yelled back. _

"_I have an idea!" She said as I pulled her into a side hug. _

_Andre looked just as scared as I felt when I asked. "Yeah? What's that?" _

_Her eyes sparkled and there was a rare smile on her face as she looked up at me. "Let's get tattoos!" _

_Oh. Tattoos. Nothing to worry about there. _

"_Jade, we're fourteen." I reminded her. "That's kind of illegal."_

_She rolled her eyes. "I have a friend who owns a little shop. It'll be fun, I promise!" _

_Hmm. Some random dude Jade knows repeatedly shoving an ink-covered needle into my skin. Sounds like a blast. "Jade…"_

"_Andre'll do it too, right, Andre?"_

"_Bye!" He called before running in the other direction. _

_Jade turned back to me. "Please?"_

_And that was how I ended up in a sketchy-looking, tiny white building in East Hollywood. Jade's friend was an abnormally thin guy in skinny jeans and a black, ratty t-shirt. He was probably a druggie-_

"Gianni is NOT a druggie!" Jade interjects.

"Whatever you say, babe." I reply.

"Just finish the story." She growls.

_Anyway, this guy stared at me dubiously as we came in, but recognized Jade right off the bat. "Jadey! Good to see ya, kid!"_

_Jadey? She barely lets me call her that…_

_The dude abandoned his sandwich at the counter and came to hug her, still giving me a strange look. "Hey Gianni," Jade took a look around the brightly lit little shop. "You paid the electric bill." She said as if it was a rare occurrence._

"_Yup." Gianni smiled proudly. "We had a good month." He laid a hand lovingly on the laminate counter. _

_"Did I hear Jade West?" A very, very large black woman ran out of the back room and grabbed Jade in a hug, lifting her off the ground._

_"Maria!" Jade growled. "You know I hate that."_

_The woman –Maria- just smiled at her. "Gianni and I have missed you."_

_Gianni nodded and was surprised his skinny little neck didn't snap."So what can I do ya for?"_

_I don't particularly like that phrase being said to my girlfriend…_

"_And who's your friend?" he asked at the same time Marie screeched. "IS THIS HIM?"_

_I'm not quite sure I want to be _**him.**

"_Oh." Jade took a step back to grab my hand and pull me closer to Gianni and Maria like she'd almost forgotten I was there. "This is my boyfriend, Beck."_

_I offered a two fingered wave. "Hey."_

_Gianni scrutinized me for a long moment before chuckling. "Jadey always did like them pretty." _

_WHAT?_

_The phone rang and Maria scurried off to answer it, leaving the two of us standing there giving Gianni strange looks._

"_Anyway," Jade continues. "I thought maybe you'd have a few new things to try."_

_So, she really brought me here to let this creepy guy use me as a guinea pig. Great. _

"_Always, babe, always." Creep Dude smiles. "Whatdya have in mind?"_

_Babe? Really? _

_Jade shrugged and plopped down into what looked a little like a dentist's chair. "What's new?"_

"_Um…" Gianni looked like he was thinking, squinting as he started cleaning a bunch of tools that looked like they could easily murder a teenage guy. "In the back room there're a sheet of new tats."_

"'_Kay, I'll go get 'em." Jade hopped up and headed for the back._

_I caught her arm and gave her a 'you're really going to leave me alone with this nutjob?' look. But she just smiled and shook her head at me before walking away. Thanks, Babe, you're so helpful leaving me alone with this mass murderer._

"_First time tat?"_

_Crap. He's was talking to me, wasn't he?_

"_Uh, yeah. Jade talked me into it."_

"_She's very persuasive, ain't she?"_

_Um… I honestly didn't know what to say to that. "She's a great girl."_

_Gianni laughs creepily. "Great. That she is."_

_Mercifully, that was when Jade came back. "I looked it over. Whatever you decide is fine."_

_If I ended up with skulls tattooed all over my wrists, I was going to kill her. _

"Well, you didn't." Tori says.

"Didn't what?" I question.

"She's still alive, and you have an anchor on your wrist." She shrugs. "Which you _still _haven't explained."

I put a hand up in surrender. "I'm getting there, I promise."

"So impatient." Jade murmurs disapprovingly.

I look down at her and shake my head. Jade is the queen of impatience.

"So,"

_"Gianni!" Maria yelled as she hung up the old school rotary phone. "I have the BEST idea."_

"The anchors?" Tori inquires, obviously a little weirded out by the story-and probably the illegal-ness of it all.

"No, actually, she suggested giraffes, but-"

_"Maria, you and one of the few people I actually like, but HELL NO!" Jade yelled, crossing her arms. _

_"Fine, fine." Maria relented. "But I have a perfect tat for the two of you." She grinned. "Even more perfect than the giraffes."_

_Jade glared dubiously at her. "Am I going to hate it?" _

_Maria shook her head. "No." _

"And that's when she blindfolded us." Jade interjects.

Tori's eyes go wide. "She _blindfolded _you? Both of you?"

I nod. "Sketchy, huh?"

_"Jade!" I whispered. "You really think this is a good idea?" _

_Jade just smirked evilly. "Oh come on, Beckett! It's an adventure!"_

_I glared back. "Two crazy people blindfolding us and illegally tattooing us is your idea of an adventure?"_

_"They aren't crazy."_

_And that's all she said before we were both blindfolded and I could hear the machines turn on. I felt Maria take my left hand and Jade's right hand gripping mine tightly. "You okay?" I asked, because she was kind of cutting off my circulation._

_"Yeah. Fine. Why wouldn't I be?"_

_I couldn't help but smile. Of course, not scared at all. Unfortunately, that's when the needles started poking into my wrist. _

_But when the bandana around my head came off, and I saw the anchor coupled with the look on Jade's face, I thought maybe it was worth the pain. Because it actually looked kind of cool, and Jade looked ridiculously happy. _

_"An anchor?" She asked, the same annoyed Jade-voice stuck around even if her eyes betrayed her. "Why?"_

_"This is him, right? The boy you told me about?"_

_My girlfriend gave the older woman a strange look. "Um, yeah, this is him."_

"_He's your anchor. Keeps you where you're meant to be." _

_Gianni grinned from is place beside Maria. "Ya know, outta jail,"_

_Jade glowered at him. "That happened __**once **__Gianni. And it was partly your fault." _

"_Children." Maria scolded playfully. "You're his anchor, too, Jadey. You balance each other out, keep each other from drifting away." She stopped and winked at us. " You'll be forever, I just know it." _

"AWW!"

"Shut up, Vega."

Aren't they precious? The expression on Tori's face is exactly the opposite of Jade's when Maria said that. There are stars in Tori Vega's eyes and she appears as if she could cry over this, which Jade would never be caught doing in public, and especially not for something like this. That's just the way she is.

And while they both fight, I think about how much that tattoo hurt, and how much Jade complicates my life. But the thing is, the pain's worth it, on both accounts, because I love her. And even though I'd never be caught saying this out loud, I hope Maria was right: that we'll be forever.

* * *

><p>REVIEW! They make me happy in the pants :)<p>

Much Love,

Calvin Munro


	12. Just This Once Part 1

Replies to some comments :)

WickedWitchOfTheWest3: I didn't break up with him because of my parents. Sadly, we broke up because he's very obsessive, and we didn't love each other. We're still friends though, even though illicitly. I think it's worth a friendship to stay up all night because its the only time we can talk. It's not like I sleep anyway :)

And thank you so much for reviewing so faithfully :)

Jacobhvilvd : Can I say I love you without being creepy? You're so sweet, and your Beck/Jade story is just lovely :)

Everyone check out and review this! .net/s/7597860/1/This_Happened_Every_Weekend

Muchas Gracias mi amigas (and amigos, should there be any guys out there, can't leave you out!)

Anyway, here is part one of a two-shot that I very much hope you will enjoy :)

* * *

><p>"I'm not sick."<p>

I've lost count of how many times Jade's said that today, but it's probably close to a dozen.

Like this morning, when we woke up. A coughing fit wracked her body the minute she sat up. "Are you cold?" She asked when she finally stopped, pulling my shirt closer around her.

"Babe, it's gotta be at least sixty-five degrees in here." I sat down the edge of the bed I lifted a hand to feel her forehead. "Are you feeling okay? That was some pretty intense coughing."

She shoved my hands away from her face. "I'm _not _sick, Beck." She said forcefully. "I don't _do _sick."

I chuckled. "Of course you don't, babe."

And again in Math, when Jade couldn't keep her head up. "Jade, honestly, just let me take you home." I begged after I caught her head before it smacked into her Algebra book a second time.

"I'm not sick."

"Jade."

"Shut up, Beck."

"Shit!"

Whoops. I wasn't paying enough attention to catch her that time.

"Everything okay, Miss West?" Mrs. Carmichael walked toward Jade, hands on her hips, that scary teacher look in her eyes.

Jade nods. "Fine."

"Then I'll thank you to leave your vulgar language out of my classroom."

Jade being Jade, she just replied "Oh dammit, I'm so fucking sorry, Mrs. Carmichael. I'll just shut the fuck up."

"Jadelyn West!"

And that was just first period.

In Improv, she fell asleep next to me and stayed that way until Sikowitz threw a coconut at the wall and screamed. "Ah! The voices are back!"

Jade jumped, and probably would've fallen on the floor if I hadn't had my arm around her. "What the hell?" She murmured, holding her head in her hand.

I shrugged as Tori and Andre tried to calm our insane teacher down. "The voices are back." I informed my girlfriend.

She rolled her eyes at Sikowitz and returned her head to my shoulder.

After Improv, she kind of disappeared, and I'm a little worried about what she's doing. I sit down on the floor in front of my locker to finish a script I need to read for tomorrow. I wonder absentmindedly if she's off earning another Saturday detention.

Jade doesn't let me wonder for long though, and five minutes later she's dropping onto the floor beside me and laying her head on my shoulder.

"You okay?" I ask, deciding I really don't want to know where she was or what she was doing.

"Fine." She says, but she lets her head slide down my chest and into my lap while she does.

I just have to laugh as she stretches her legs out on the floor, letting me run my fingers through her long hair. "Sure you don't want me to take you home?"

"_Dude_. I'm _fine_. Let it go."

I'd believe her if she hadn't suddenly stopped the physical abuse. Usually, a _"Dude!" _like that is accompanied by a punch to the arm. Not that I miss it, I'm just saying: she's lying.

I place a hand on her forehead, and man she's burning up. "Babe, your forehead's really, really hot. You've got a fever."

Jade just sighs exaggeratedly. "Beckett, when will you learn that _all _of me is _always _hot?"

* * *

><p>"Beck!"<p>

My head snaps up. Why is Tori Vega suddenly in my Biology II class yelling at me? That's more Jade's forte…

"Miss Vega! Mr. Harris! You're disrupting my class!"

Tori gave Mr. Lombardes a terrified glance. "Jade's upchucking in the girl's bathroom." She tells us both quickly. "She won't let me help her."

"Which one?" I ask her, standing up.

"Mr. Oliver!" Lombardes protests.

"The one nearest to the front doors." Andre answers for her, taking my notebook from me.

"We'll take notes." Tori promises as somehow she and Andre settle themselves at my desk.

Mr. Lombardes looks a little shell-shocked, but I don't stay to explain. "Thanks guys."

They both just wave me off.

"Jade?" I push the door to the girls' bathroom open slowly.

The things I do for this girl.

* * *

><p>Jade's POV<p>

* * *

><p>I must be really out of it to think I hear Beck talking to me. I lean over the toilet again, wishing it would just end. This is absolutely disgusting.<p>

I hate so many things, but you should know that vomiting is ON THAT LIST!

"Jade?"

Oh God. I'm becoming Sikowitz, hearing voices.

But then I feel my hair being pulled away from my face, and when I sit back I'm in someone's lap. A tan hand comes up and wipes my mouth off with a paper towel and I just have to crack the other eye open to see: black combat boots under my legs- oh hey, maybe I'm not crazy.

I lean my head back against Beck's shoulder. "What're you doing in a women's bathroom, stupid?" my voice comes out annoyingly hoarse and pathetic.

He hands me water bottle. "See, there's this girl," He says, holding the bottom of the bottle so I don't drop it.

His admonition of: "Small sips." interrupts his explanation. "And she's got a hold on me."

"Yeah?" I hand the bottle back to him. "She pretty?"

"Gorgeous. Most amazing eyes I've ever seen." I feel him tying my hair back with a bracelet from his wrist. "Somehow she's brought me to the point where I'll do just about anything for her."

"Hm. Must be a pretty great girl."

I can't believe this. What's happened to me? I'm Jade fucking West! I don't do romantic banter. Or sickness.

I must be more out of it than I thought.

"Oh she is. She's even got me on the floor of a girls' bathroom."

"Good for her." I mumble.

"And probably a detention for leaving class."

"She's turned you into a rebel."

"So if she's done throwing up, I'll take her home now." Beck rubs circles on my knee.

"I'm not sure I can walk." I mutter miserably.

Ugh. Gross. Admitting I need his help.

"That's okay." He assures me, carefully standing up with me in his arms.

He takes a few cautious steps. "You okay?"

I nod and close my eyes. Just this once, it's okay. I'll let him carry me. Just. This. Once.

* * *

><p>Review, my lovely, lovely readers! Because reviews make me update faster :)<p>

Much Love,

Calvin Munro


	13. Just This Once P2: My Boyfriend's Shirts

HALLO! MY NAME IS INDIGO MONTOYA; YOU KILL MY FATHER, PREPARE TO DIE!

Just kidding! :) But don't you love The Princess Bride? Just amazing :)

Anyway, here is your update! Thank you all for your amazing support and for sticking with me even though I'm so flaky and am always making promises I can't keep. Seriously, I love you guys

* * *

><p>Despite her continuing insistence that she isn't sick ("Babe, just let me take you to the doctor." "No! I'm NOT sick!"), she only stayed awake long enough to argue with him over going to the doctor and decide she wanted to go home. Yeah, weird, but she also told him her parents weren't home this week and, quote, "There's no way in hell I'm going to willingly throw up in an RV bathroom, Beck."<p>

"Babe, we're here." he touches her shoulder.

He would just carry her in, but he already got a few dirty looks for taking her out to the car the first time. Jade _hates _being carried. He's not really sure why, but she makes it indubitably clear as often as necessary. Well, Jade's definition of necessary, anyway.

She sits up slowly, glaring at the way he's watching her. "I'm capable of getting out of the car, Beckett." She snaps.

It's probably not safe for him to mention that she actually wasn't fifteen minutes ago, so like the good boyfriend he is, he just replies: "Of course."

He makes her sit on the couch once they get inside while he gathers up some cough syrup, a couple of blankets, and a bottle of water. "I can just blow off the rest of school." He tells her as he gently pushes her backward and into a laying position on the couch.

"Nope. You have to take a math test." Jade answers sleepily, her eyes closing.

"Believe me, babe, I'd rather be here with you than at school taking a math test."

"I'll be fine. You already got one detention for me; don't try to play the martyr."

And then she's asleep and there's no point in arguing any more. She'd probably just smack him if he was still there when she woke up. So he relents, putting a trashcan beside the couch and kissing her hair before leaving a note and heading back to school.

* * *

><p>Jade's POV<p>

He left me a note. Yeah, he's just that lame. Here's what it said:

Babe,

I left cough syrup and a water bottle on the coffee table. (Speaking of, NO COFFEE! It'll make you barf again). Be careful of how much of the medication you take.

I'll be back after detention, but until I'm there, BEHAVE! If you need anything in the meantime, call me. I've never tried to escape detention before…

Love you,

Beck

Geez, Beck. All the capital letters. Anyway, I can't stop coughing, and since I haven't thrown up since school, I head for that repulsive looking medicine. Just so you know, it takes as utterly disgusting as it looks.

But it helps, so I take another swig. Yeah, that's much better.

I slip into one of the shirts I've hijacked from Beck before laying back down, burrowing under four blankets. Maybe if I was sweeter, I'd wait up for him, ask how the math test went and thank him for getting detention because of me. But I think we all know I've never been described as sweet. So instead I just close my eyes and wait to drift off again.

* * *

><p>Third-Person POV<p>

The rest of his day was decidedly uneventful, except for Cat asking him where Jade was twelve times before actually listening to the answer and freaking out. "Beck! Is she ALONE? Is she OKAY? Will she LIVE? IS SHE GOING TO DIE?"

"Cat, she's okay, I promise." He puts a hand on her shoulder to stop her nervous bouncing. "But she was throwing up!" Cat protests. "You can't be okay AFTER YOU"VE JUST THROWN UP!"

"I'm heading over to check on her now, Kitty Cat."

"Can I come?" She asks, that little-kid look in her eyes.

He imagines the scenario. Jade waking up to a bouncing, screaming Cat; and then the quick demise of the poor redhead. "How about I call you when I get there and tell you how she's doing?"

She pouts for a moment, but eventually nods. "Fine. But you better call."

"Of course." He kisses her forehead just like he does with his little sisters if only to get her to stop crying. He waves to everyone else. "See you guys."

A chorus of "Bye!"'s rings out behind him as he heads out of Sikowitz's room before the teacher can toss another coconut at his head. You laugh, but those suckers hurt when he doesn't miss. Trust Sikowitz's poor students.

She's locked the door for some unknown reason. He digs around in his pockets, wondering if he's really put it in his pocket every day for this long. She knew he was coming back; why would she lock the freakin… Oh, there's the key.

Good thing they exchanged keys last year, or it'd be freshman year all over again. Unsurprisingly, it really hurts to fall off a fence and into absurdly expensive landscaping. He had those scrapes for weeks, but he thinks that night was worth it.

"Jade?" He calls as he walks in. "You awake?"

He passes through the long hallway, and takes a right into the living room. "Jade?"

His girlfriend sits up, a perplexed look on her face. "Oh. Hey. When did you get here?"

Her voice sounds… well, not like she wants to murder him, which is pretty much how it's sounded all, well, the whole time he's known her.

He kneels beside the couch. "Just a second ago. How're you feelin'?"

"Great! I feel awesome!"

Okay, wait, what? Awesome? "Babe, are you alright?"

"Don't call me 'babe'." She growls, lying back down. "Only my boyfriend calls me that."

Um…

"Jade, I _am _your boyfriend."

_"_No, my boyfriend's in detention. Did you know he got detention because of me?" She smiles. "And he's totally fine with it."

"Jade," That's when he notices that there's an empty cough syrup bottle on the coffee table. _Empty. _"Jade! This was full when I left! Did you drink the _entire bottle_?"

She shrugs. "It helped. I stopped coughing."

He facepalms. "_Jade!_"

"What?" She looks up at him, an innocent little-kid look on her face that reminds him of Cat.

"You can't drink an _entire _bottle of cough syrup!"

"Why not?"

"I- Uh-" And he suddenly realizes he has no idea what happens to a person when they drink a whole bottle of cough syrup. "Stay here." he tells her, crossing the room and into the kitchen to find a phone number for the emergency room.

"Uh, hi. I just came home and, um," He recognizes he sounds like an idiot. "Look, my girlfriend drank an entire bottle of cough syrup. I just want to be sure she'd be okay or if I need to take her to the hospital."

The man on the other end chuckles. "It shouldn't be too much of a problem, son. She'll probably be pretty loopy, but eventually she'll vomit all of it up and be okay."

Great, more vomiting. "So what should I do? I mean is there anything-"

"Just treat her like she's drunk." The man says. "Any other questions?"

"Uh, no, I guess that's it. Thanks."

"Sure thing, kid."

The line goes dead and he walks back to his girlfriend. "So, am I going to die?" She asks amicably.

"Nope, you'll be fine." He sits down beside her. "Are you really watching American Idol?"

Beck doesn't let Jade watch American Idol at his RV because of her tendency to throw things at the TV when bad singers try out. He reasons that the TV is still intact, so the cough medicine must be doing well. "The horrible singers in bikinis amuse me."

He laughs, because its not often that Jade is this docile. It's quiet until Jade pipes up again with her running commentary. "Steven Tyler is as ugly as fuck."

"I have to agree with you on that one." Beck replies.

It's weird for him to sit there, barely touching her because she's convinced he's someone else. But it's oddly nice to be there with her. They're not fighting or making out or writing the next chapter in their weird breakfast food fetish; they're just sitting. Together, and happy. For the most part, because Jade hates being sick, but whatever.

"When we were fourteen, Beck and I used to watch this show together." Jade tells him. "I always yelled at the terrible people and the judges, but Beck just laughed at me. He thought it was hilarious."

"Until you threw the remote at the TV." Beck finishes.

"Yeah, how'd you know?" She turns her head to look at him.

He grins. "Lucky guess."

"He doesn't let me watch it at his place anymore. Says he got tired of buying new channel changers."

"No kidding. Those things are expensive."

When she falls asleep again, he swings her into his arms and carries her up the stairs, and this is probably the only time he'll ever think that he's really, really glad Jade's high off of cough syrup.

She must wake up when they get to her room, because she answers when he says, "Nice shirt." sarcastically as he slips her under the covers.

It must be one of the many shirts she's stolen over the two years they've been together.

"It's my boyfriend's." She informs him sleepily. "I like to sleep in them."

It occurs to him that maybe he should ask her who she thinks he is, but he'd rather not hear whatever weirdness loopy-Jade comes up with. It could very well scar him for life.

"Yeah?" he sits down on the floor beside the bed. "Why's that?"

"I like the way they make me feel safe. Like Beck does when we stay together."

WHAT? Did she seriously just…? "Really? Did you tell him that?"

"No. I would never tell him that."

"Why not?"

He kind of feels bad, taking advantage of her current loopiness. But she's right; under normal circumstances she would never tell him any of this. She's happy. _He _makes her happy.

And with someone who takes as much work as Jade, it's amazing to hear those words from her mouth.

"Because I'm fucking _Jade West_. I don't do emotional crap like that. I'm not good at being nice."

"Oh. Well, it's nice of him to let you take his clothes."

"He doesn't exactly know I take them." Her eyes are closed, and she looks close to sleep. "I'll give them back."

He chuckles, because he knows she's been taking them since three weeks after they started dating. She probably has more of his clothes than he does. It's not that he minds, she actually looks kinda cute in them. Don't tell her he said that though.

"Your boyfriend sounds like a great guy."

Alright, now he's just fishing.

"He is. He's pretty much perfect."

No. Freaking. Way.

"How so?"

Jade's words are a little slurred, but he can still tell what she's saying, and it makes him so glad he's stuck with her all this time.

"He got detention just to take me home, dude. How many boyfriends do that? My _dad _doesn't even leave work to do that. Beck's always been there, and he loves me."

Is it lame for him to say he never knew she thought all this?

"Do you love him?"

"Yeah, I do. I love him."

He waits until she falls asleep to climb in beside her. All this just makes it official. Even though she has to be veritably drunk off of cough syrup to tell him, he knows she really loves him. There's absolutely no question. "I love you too."

* * *

><p>And two weeks later, when she shoves his shirt at him, he just smiles and kisses her gently. "It's yours, babe."<p>

* * *

><p>Well, I hope it lived up to all your expectations and that the POV changes weren't too hard to understand.<p>

REVIEW MY DEARS! OR I WILL FIND YOU!

Just Kidding :)

Much Love,

Calvin Munro

PS WHO SAW ELIZABETH GILLIES IN WHITE COLLAR LAST WEEK? EPIC!


	14. And Equality for All Breakfast Foods

HEY EVERYONE! Look who's all responsible and updated TWICE in ONE week? ME! Oh yes, confetti everywhere!

Anyway :)

People keep telling me that it's Bade week, apparently. So HAPPY BADE WEEK! I know, I have given in to the couple name-shushing epidemic, but I just couldn't help it. So to celebrate Bade week, here is a quite substantial oneshot for all you lovely people.

I keep forgetting this: Disclaimer: Fine, Dan, you can own Victorious. I'll let you. BUT if you make Beck and Jade break up, I WILL FIND YOU! I don't own anything else recognizable, either.

And DUDE! What IS it with me and breakfast foods?

* * *

><p>I jumped the fence. I probably shouldn't have. I probably should've just knocked or called Jade to let me in, but I thought maybe this would be romantic.<p>

This was before I remembered Jade isn't one for romantic gestures (she chopped the roses I brought her to bits). But whatever, I'm already over the fence; I might as well go with it.

I picked up a handful of rocks from the landscaping behind the house. It occurs to me that I might have terrible aim, but I just pick out Jade's window and toss the first rock. To my relief, it hits the window square on with a satisfying _smack! _

But nothing happens. No Jade, no movement or lights turning on in the house. This plan may not work.

I toss another rock, and there's still no reaction. "You can't honestly be sleeping through this, Jade!" I say in full voice, sending another rock sailing through the air.

Whoops. It's the middle of the night, isn't it? Crap.

But now the window opens and Jade sticks her head out. "Who says I can't?"

I smile and let the rest of the rocks drop to the ground. "You're up, aren't you?"

"You know, there's a door here." She doesn't look or sound at all like she just woke up.

I shrug. "Doors. Overrated. This is romantic."

Jade's making a face at me; I know she is even though I can't really see her too well in the darkness. "It's loud is what it is."

I just grin at her. "Sorry."

"I have neighbors."

"What a shame."

She chuckles a little. "Why are you here anyway?"

"Meet me out front; we're going on an adventure."

"You do realize it's two in the morning, right?" Jade crosses her arms over her chest.

I nod. "That's what makes it an adventure!"

"You're such an idiot."

I grin at her again, just to annoy her. "But you love me anyway."

She slams the window shut. I laugh, and hope she'll come out.

* * *

><p>I'm sitting on the hood of my truck when she does come out. She's dressed in jeans and one of my shirts, tugging a sweater over her shoulders as she makes her way down the walkway. "This had better be good." She threatens.<p>

I open the passenger side door for her. "You're with me; it's got to be good, right?"

She glares at me, probably for opening the door for her. I lean closer and kiss her gently. "Good yet?" I ask.

Jade pulls me back to her again. "Not quite." She mumbles.

It's hard to keep my cool when she's kissing me like this, but I'd say I'm doing a pretty good job of it. That is, until she falls back into the truck and takes me with her, somehow maneuvering so our lips never loose contact. And just as suddenly as it started, Jade pushes me off and closes the door.

All I can do is shake my head and smile, because this is Jade all the way. "So you dragged me out of bed at two am to go where, exactly?"

"You'll see."

* * *

><p>"Waffle House? You threw rocks at my window for <em>Waffle House<em>?"

I shrug. "I wanted waffles."

"So? You could've left me out of this!"

"Waffles are considerably less delicious alone." I open her door and she slides out, glaring at me. "I could be asleep right now."

I don't reply because it's going to be much worse once she sees the others. "BECK! You not only woke me up, you also invited _them_?"

"I didn't think you'd want me to be here with them without you."

"Aw! It's nice to see you too Jade!" Tori exclaims as acerbically as possible.

I grab Jade's arm before she can leave and pull her into the booth beside me. "You look angry, Jadey." Cat pouts, pausing her coloring to stare at her best friend.

"Aladdin here woke me up in the middle of the night to go to _Waffle House_." She jerks her thumb in my direction.

Don't you love the way Jade can make any word sound like the worst thing that ever happened to mankind? "Usually she likes it when I keep her awake all night." I smirk and start a crawly snake with Andre's straw wrapper.

Jade smacks me and I just laugh, because I'm not going to give her the satisfaction of knowing how much it hurt. "But I LOVE waffles, Jadey!" Cat protests.

"DON'T CALL ME THAT!"

The waitress walks up right at that moment, and gives me a sympathetic smile. "Hey, my name is-"

"We don't care." Jade interrupts.

I shake my head at her and snake an arm around her waist. "Sorry," I tell the little blonde girl.

"Don't apologize to-"

"Sh, Jade-"

"Don't shush me-"

"Honestly, just-"

"I'm not going to-"

"Babe-"

"Seriously, I can't believe-"

And then our lips are attached, my hand behind her neck and a surprised "Mph!" coming from Jade. I can't imagine the look on the waitress' face, but our friends are used to this, so they're already ordering and acting completely normal. Jade pushes me away after a second. "You know, making out doesn't always end fights." She says just like she always does, turning away from me and stealing Robbie's menu as Rex mutters something about how we're "So messed up, man!"

"Oh yeah? Because I've found it's enormously effective."

She elbows me. "And one day, I'm going to win a fight because I made you believe I was right, not due to you giving in because you'd rather fuck than fight."

"Whatever you say, Babe." I smirk at her.

"See what I mean?"

But everyone else is either laughing or ignoring us. The poor young waitress looks so bewildered that I feel sorry for her. Not because Jade and I are a walking freak show, but because she probably doesn't understand that we act like this because we love each other more than anything in the world. That no matter how bad things get, we're still better off together than we are apart.

"Can't blame him," Andre chuckles.

"Ugh! What is it with guys and sex?" Tori's face is red, and honestly the innocence is nice.

In a "Aww isn't she naïve?" way.

Jade orders a cup of coffee while Rex makes some obscene comment, and then promptly lets her head drop into her crossed arms on the table. I kind of feel bad for waking her up when I see her so tired, but it dissipates when she mutters: "You _would _order a waffle,"

"What's wrong with waffles?" I defend. "This _is _Waffle House."

"I LOVE waffles!" Cat shrieks again from across the table.

"They're so ridiculous with their little squares." Jade mumbles, and I realize I've been absentmindedly rubbing her back. Force of habit. "You have to put all the toppings in like, every freaking square or it's totally jank."

I chuckle. Only Jade has such strong feelings about waffles. "I know you're a pancake person, but you should still be nice to waffles. They are who they are, they can't help it."

My girlfriend's face is hidden, but I can tell by the slight shake of her shoulders that she's laughing at least a little. "The waffles aren't Ke$ha, Beck."

"Shh! You'll hurt their feelings!"

"Don't hurt the waffles' feelings, Jadey!"

Gotta love Cat.

"The waffles don't have feelings!"

"And equality, liberty and justice for all breakfast foods." Andre announces, lifting his cup.

Robbie imitates him and clinks his glass with Andre's. "Tolerance for waffles everywhere."

* * *

><p>Two hours later, we're parked in Jade's driveway, laying in the back of my pick-up. You can't really see any stars, but it's the idea of it that's the appeal, right? Jade's in her normal sleeping position, one of her legs thrown over my waist, an arm draped over my chest, and her head against my shoulder. And this, exactly, is why I woke her up.<p>

Not for the waffles (though they were a plus), not for our friends (although they're always very entertaining), and not just to annoy her (even if it is immensely fun). I woke her up just because it felt wrong to sleep any other way but this way: tangled up in Jade. That sounds lame, I know, but it's still the truth.

"Was it really that bad?" I ask.

"Was what really that bad?" Her voice sounds normal, the coffee must've helped.

"Tonight."

She sighs, and pulls the blanket we keep in the backseat up further. "No." She whispers. "It was…" She sounds as if she was about to admit she had fun, but then she finished the sentence with a simple: "Fine."

"Oh just admit you had a blast."

"No."

I kiss the top of her head. "I know you did."

"Whatever."

She plays it cool, but we all know if she really was upset she wouldn't be this calm. No, my fish would probably have been murdered, and my favorite shirt shredded (again). I'm still lost in thought when Jade's suddenly on top of me, leaning down to kiss me.

All pretense of fatigue is gone as her tongue fights with mine for control, her hands impatiently clawing at my shirt, mine rising to rest on her hips. I can't believe she can just go from zero to sixty like this, but considering where we just were...

"Your parents aren't here to find us, are they?" I ask, and it's miraculous that I can form such a coherent sentence when Jade's kissing her way down my neck like this.

"Nope, just the neighbors."

"Damn those neighbors."

Jade just laughs.

* * *

><p>"You should apologize to waffles." I murmur, dropping a kiss to her collarbone before tugging my jeans back on.<p>

"And just why would I do that?" she pulls my shirt over her head, not bothering with her bra that has to be somewhere in the truck's bed… I hope…

"Because," I reach over and wrap us both in the blanket. "You may not like them, but they worked just as well as other breakfast foods."

She turns her head to look at me, her dark hair splayed out behind her. I stare back, both of us expressionless, noses almost touching. That's when we burst out laughing and realize we aren't even the weirdest people we know.

* * *

><p>So yeah. There it was. SOOOO weird, but hey, that's who I am.<p>

So let's go over this:

Happy Bade Week

Review if you liked, review if you didn't. I can take whatever you have to say. Constructive criticism is much appreciated, and so is praise

AND PRACTICE TOLERANCE FOR ALL BREAKFAST FOODS!

:)

Much Love,

Calvin Munro


	15. Dave and the Insufferable Newscaster

So... I'm just gonna pretend I didn't abandon you for a really really long time, mmk? Good. Anyway... Dave Coulier was on the news this morning, and I could not help myself. Victorious never actually says anything about Beck liking Full House (they couldn't anyway, because of copyright and all that jazz) but so many people, including me, put that little fact in their fics. So I was helpless but to think of Beck when I saw that. And so was born this.

Disclaimer: I don't own Victorious, Dave Coulier, or the hat I'm wearing. Sad day.

This is for **daniyeahthatsme, **because she is very sweet and I appreciate her very much for hanging tough and sticking with me.

* * *

><p>"Jade! Hey, babe!"<p>

Okay, let's get one thing straight: I am NOT a morning person. I hate waking up early, and I especially hate getting up early on the rare occasions when I actually sleep at 'home'. So when-for some unknown reason- Beck is running through my parents' house calling for me, the fact that I'm annoyed is the understatement of the year.

"Oh, hey Mrs. West." I can only imagine what face my mother is making at him right now.

She likes Beck- probably more than she likes me- but she doesn't take kindly to anyone bursting into her perfect, posh mansion at seven in the morning yelling for me.

"Jade!" And now he's in my room. Lovely. How did he get past Mom?

"What the hell, Beck?" I don't even open my eyes. "It's seven am on a _saturday_."

"I know, but you've gotta see this!" He sits on the edge of my bed, and I haven't seen him this excited since he landed the lead in Uptown Downtown. His parents' constant fighting has really been getting to him. I know what that's like, so when he tugs me into a sitting position beside him and shoves his PearPhone into my hands, I let him. "Look who was on the news this morning!"

Oh God. You have to be kidding me. The newscaster with the horrible hair sits in the studio talking to none other than Dave Coulier. Uncle Joey.

I should have known this level of excitement had to do with Full House.

"Really, Beck?" He just grins at me.

"Yep! Listen to why he's there!"

So many exclamation points so early in the morning.

"So, Dave, why are you in our beautiful LA this week?"The insufferable woman on the video asks.

"Well, I've been asked to do two nights at The Buzzer Comedy Club this week."

Beck pauses the video and looks at me with the most irresistible little-kid look I've ever seen in my life. "Dave Coulier. The Buzzer. This week."

I can't help but laugh just a little. "Honestly?"

He nods. "Wanna go?"

I swear, I am such a sucker for this boy. "Beck..." It's sooo hard to say no right now.

He watches me expectantly, and I could swear he bats his eyelashes just a bit. "Please?"

I try to look away from his chocolate brown eyes, because I know they'll be my undoing. I fairly certain my mom's watching us from the hallway, and that's the only reason he isn't trying to convince me with his tongue. It's not like I blame him, though. It's actually very effective for both of us. Plus, it's not often that I reject sex with Beck.

I take a deep breath, and his bottom lip juts out almost imperceptibly. "Okay, okay, fine!" I throw my hands in the air. "Fine! I'll go."

"YES!" He jumps up and proceeds to do the most uncoordinated, embarrassing victory dance I've ever seen in my life. "I love you." He tells me, leaning down and kissing me quickly, grabbing his phone from my hands. "I have to go meet my dad at his law firm, but I'll see you later."

I nod, and the giant smile on his face is just too damn cute for me to not put my hand on his jaw and pull him back in for another kiss. Beck sighs happily. "Mmm, you make it so hard to leave." He murmurs, pressing little pecks to my nose, my forehead.

He leans back for a moment to look at me, debating, before pressing one more unfairly short kiss to my lips. "Mmm. Okay, I really do need to leave. See you!"

He bounds out of my room like an ecstatic puppy, tossing a "Bye Mrs. West!" Over his shoulder on the way.

Of course. Mom's been watching the whole time. Creeper.

"You're a dork!" I call to Beck as he heads for the stairs.

"I love you too!" He yells back and I listen to his combat boots retreating across the kitchen and out the side door.

My mother pushes open the door and rests a hip on the jamb. "You really should be sweet to him, Jadelyn. He's such a nice boy."

But by now I've already collapsed back onto my pillow and closed my eyes. Not like I would've had anything to say to that anyway, though.

* * *

><p>And that night, as Beck and I sit side by side in the dirty, somewhat run down comedy club listening to Dave Coulier tell really lame jokes, I can't even be angry. Even though there's plastic whatever-wrappers, assorted food, and other unidentifiable crap littering the floor, annoying people laughing way to loudly, and the chairs are as uncomfortable as when Sikowitz starts buttering his feet in class. Because right here, with Beck, it's okay.<p>

He's happy. No matter how stupid this whole thing is, no matter how ridiculous my boyfriend's obsession with a '90's TV series is. I'm glad I came.

* * *

><p>Geez, I am so hopelessly cheesy. Review beautiful people :)<p> 


	16. Emotional Barfing

Just a little something. I probably overdid this. By a lot. So, I watched Cat's New Boyfriend and I felt like Beck's apology needed to be clarified and then it just dwindled into this emotional barf. Ahahaha, wow. I guess it's not quite as bad as I just made it sound. Plus I just really like that moment. Review? Thanks :) Y'all know I love you.

Diclaimer: I don't own Victorious and I somewhat stole the term "soul kissing" from Rachel Cohn's book Gingerbread.

* * *

><p>"I apologize for...her."<p>

I felt like something should be said. I'm going to follow her, of course, but Jade's not one to apologize. So I did it for her.

When I reach her, Jade quirks an eyebrow. "You apologize for... me?" She mimics.

It's surprising how much Tori's general awkwardness puts Jade in a good mood. A less happy Jade would be verbally (and quite possible physically) murdering me right now. But maybe she gets it that I was apologizing _for _her. Not apologizing for _her_.

I shrug. "I figured at least one half of us should apologize."

My girlfriend rolls her eyes. "So now you're my other half?"

"But fer sure." I grin at her and let her push me up against the lockers.

It's my (somewhat ridiculous) philosophy that there are all kinds of kisses. There's the sleazy, groping kind of making out, the kind that says "I wanna fucking tear you apart.". There's the quick one's that say simply "See ya." or "Jade, babe, chill." Then there's the passionate, hurried kind that say "I love you, but I just really wanna get you out of your clothes."

All of those are fun, no doubt, but I think I'm partial to the last kind.

I will probably NEVER say this out loud EVER, but I like to call it "soul kissing". Only in my head, though. It's that slow, gentle kind of kiss that lets you tell someone how much you love them without saying a word. It's the type you give when all you want to do is hold that person you love.

And even though I'd never say it, and Jade will never admit it anyway, I think it's both of our favorites.

Okay, wow. I'm done overanalyzing things in an absurdly sappy way now; you can stop retching your guts up.

Let's just say that this is an amazing kiss and wish the bell wasn't ringing so, so badly. Jade starts to pull away, but I won't let her go just yet. She's a little too irresistible and I'm a little too willing to drag her into the janitor's closet right now. I hear Tori saying something in the background that may have been directed at us, but I don't think either of us really care. We're just trying to steal a few more seconds.

"You okay?" Jade asks when I loosen my grip enough for her to stand up straight.

"Fine." I smile at her and kiss her forehead.

"Then stop emotionally barfing in your brain." She sticks her tongue out at me.

I'm sort of shocked that she knows that. But then, she's Jade. "I love you." I tell her, stealing one last kiss.

"You better..." She says slowly, looking at me quizzically as if I'm insane as she lets me take her hand and walk her to class.

I don't mind, though. I feel kind of insane. As lame as it sounds, the dizzy look on Jade's face after we separated just makes me happy.

I have another philosophy for you now: being in love makes you sound like a pansy.

But you know what? I wouldn't trade this for the world.

Because when we get to the Algebra II classroom, my girlfriend looks me straight in the eyes, without any warning and says "I love you too, Beck."

* * *

><p>Sorry it was so short. Review? Does anyone read these? Hmmm. BANANAS! Uh... HIPPOS!<p>

Much Love,

Calvin Munro


	17. Maybe Horrible People Aren't So Bad

Hello! I didn't make you wait too terribly long, did I? I tried to do better. So, I wrote this because I have read TONS of fics where Tori is characterized as an awful, terrifying, boyfriend-stealing monster. But when I think about her character on the show, it's pretty obvious that's not who she is. I'm not trying to bash those stories or authors- some of them are very good- I just have a different standpoint.

Anyway, here is my humble offering :) And I would really love to hear any suggestions you have. I seem to be running out of them.

Disclaimer: So yesterday I hopped in my Charger and drove down to LA. When I ran into Dan Schneider at a major movie premier (He was standing next to Avan Jogia, with whom I had a one night stand, btw) and I asked him to sign over the rights to Victorious for three dollars in change and a pick from my pocket. HE SAID YES! So now, although I own Victorious, I am still writing crappy fanfiction on a website!

(Just in case you're very Sheldon-like, that **was indeed sarcasm** :)

* * *

><p>Tori's POV<p>

I feel like a horrible person. I'm watching another girl's boyfriend. Is this how Andre felt? Being in love with Jade when she's in love with Beck?  
>Beck. Oh man. I shouldn't have sat across from him. He was the perfect gentleman about the whole thing, too. Willing to have me sit with him, but in that non-committal, 'there's no way we could be more than friends' way.<p>

I admire his beautiful Aladdin-hair from across the table, trying not to stare. It's hard, though, the way he moves is mesmerizing. I don't even hear anything when Jade comes up to our table and drops her purse on the ground.

She takes the Tech Theater book out of Beck's hands and lays it facedown on the table before crawling into his lap. She lays her head on his shoulder before giving him back his textbook. Beck chuckles as he wraps his arms around his girlfriend, nuzzling a few kisses into her neck. "You okay, babe?"

Jade shrugs. "I just felt like being held."

Whoa. WHAT? She must not have noticed I'm here.

Beck doesn't seem surprised though, he just squeezes her in a hug. "Lucky for you, I'm pretty good at that."

Jade lets him get away with that with only a scoff and a "You're lame." in response, eyes are closed and looking like there's no place she'd rather be than Beck's arms.

Cue the immense guilt returning. I've always tried to be the kind of girl people like. Sweet, helpful, not the boyfriend-stealing type. But ever since meeting Beck, my thoughts have gotten dangerous.

"That's why you love me so much." Beck replies, pressing a kiss to her hair.

Jade decides not to contest this, and kisses his neck instead. Beck goes back to his book, one hand holding it open while the other rubs circles on Jade's thigh, her knee, plays with her hair, travels up and down her side; all those boyfriendly things guys do when they really love their girlfriends. He smiles at me when he catches me watching, and it hurts that it's so painfully obvious.

Beck loves Jade. Jade loves Beck. They wouldn't be the same without each other, and breaking them up would mean breaking them both. As much as I wish Beck was mine, I could never do that to them.

I try not to look up when Beck whispers, "Love you." in his girlfriend's ear.

Jade looks like she's asleep, but she doesn't miss a beat. "Love you too."

And just like that, my heart is broken all over again.

Jade's POV

I hate talking to my mother in general, but its worse when she calls me at school, in a drunken stupor. I finally got out of her that she was at home with my dad, so thankfully I can cross 'rescue mission' off of my list of things to do. Now my list only contains one thing: curl up in Beck's lap, close my eyes and let him hold me until it just doesn't matter anymore. Not even Vega's presence in the library with my boyfriend is enough to dissuade me.

Normally, I'd be mad that _Vega_'s in here with _my _boyfriend, but honestly, right now, it doesn't even matter. Even though I hate her. A lot.

Beck seems a little surprised when I take his book from him and crawl into his lap, but he recovers nicely and reacts just like I wanted him to. His arms go around me and he kisses my neck. "You okay?"

Of course he would pick up on it. The different kind of frustration than the usual. He's just that attentive. Not that I'm complaining.

"I just felt like being held." I tell him truthfully, snuggling closer and imagining the look on Vega's stupid face.

I usually _never _say things that sappy. True or not. But if there's one thing I'm not, it's predictable.

"Lucky for you, I'm pretty good at that."

"You're lame." I inform him, closing my eyes and easing a little bit closer. Although I'm not sure it's possible to get too much closer.

There's nowhere I'd rather be.

"That's why you love me so much." He presses his lips to my hair and I reciprocate with a kiss to his neck.

I'd protest, but it's kind of true. I do enjoy his sappiness- when I'm in the mood for it, like now. I'm so un-mushy that I don't mind his chick-flick declarations most of the time.

Beck goes back to his book, but he keeps an absentminded hand on my leg. He rubs circles into my black-jean-clad legs, and this is exactly what I wanted. He's so warm, I could just go to sleep.

It's fitting that he's never cold, and I always am. It's just the kind of cheesy romantic crap that you people would think of for a couple like us. Honestly, that's really stupid, but you can think whatever the fuck you want. I don't care.

Although, if Vega doesn't stop staring, I might have to punch her ridiculous little face.

* * *

><p>Yeah... Sorry...<p>

PLEASE REVIEW AND TELL ME WAHT YOU THOUGHT!

Also, if you have any suggestions I IMPLORE you to share them with me! POR FAVOR!

Much Love,

Calvin Munro


	18. Anorexic Vultures

Hey everybody! Sorry it's been so long (again) but here is another oneshot! By the way, I am very sorry, but I have deleted my wedding story Insert Witty Title Here. I just couldn't juggle every. However, I will be publishing chapters that would've gone there here, so you get more frequent updates, the same content, just a different story. Cool? Good.

I am extremely fond of this. I hope you are too :)

Disclaimer: Yeah, yeah, don't y'all know by now?

* * *

><p>"I AM FREAKING OUT! And I don't freak out. Ever. I'm cool. Just look at my hair!"<p>

"Beck. Cool it man."

Great. I just said those things out loud, didn't I? A-freakin-mazing.

I nervously run a hand through my (awesome) hair. "I can't, Andre! I'm getting _married_!"

"Yes, you are. Thanks for remembering."

Jade. My heart rate slows until I look at her, in a short black dress and red high heels. It speeds right back up as my eyes travel up her long legs. Good. Lord.

She snaps her fingers next to her face. "Eyes up here." She commands sternly, but I catch a hint of a smile on her lips.

Cat and Tori (only here because she's Andre's plus one) stand behind her, both of them smirking. "Your parents are looking for you two." Robbie says.

Thankfully, he's left Rex in the car for the night, and he actually looks nice; both of which I'm sure are Jade's mother's doing. That woman could probably command an entire army if she wanted to; she's doing a pretty good job partnering with my mom to run this wedding. I shudder to think what they want.

"And now I'm gonna run away, cause those chicks are scary." He finishes.

The whole gang utters their agreement and troops out after Robbie, leaving us alone.

"What is this thing called again?" I ask Jade as she grips my hands and pulls me to my feet.

"A rehearsal, genius." She informs me. "Think you can handle it?"

I frown at her, but lean in and kiss her lips. "And why do we need to rehearse getting married?"

"Because you had to have a traditional wedding," She drags me along with her.

I have to admit, the field we chose to tie the knot in looks great. There's a big, white, wall-less tent was set up towards the middle, and Christmas lights are strung everywhere. Row upon row of white folding chairs sit under the tent, more Christmas lights along with a single lily and a black rose adorning the aisle seats. The lights even stretch down either side of the aisle Jade will walk down tomorrow.

"I hope it rains tomorrow." My fiancé says absentmindedly, taking my hand in hers.

I stare at her. "Why? That would be a disaster."

Jade smirks. "All those uppity people your mom and my mom invited screaming and running around like the idiotic, anorexic vultures they are."

I can't help but chuckle, both at the mental picture she'd painted in my head and the fact that she would define such an instance as a great thing. "If vultures are scary because they eat dead things, wouldn't vulture anorexia be a good thing?" I question.

Jade looks like she wants to slap me for a second, then changes her mind, cocking her head to one side. "Hmm. That's actually a good question." She admits.

I laugh outright, now that most of my nervousness has dissipated. It's funny that Jade calling people 'idiotic, anorexic vultures' calms my nerves. My fiancé can certainly be a gank sometimes, but life with her is NEVER boring.

"Beck!" My mom calls. "I need you and Jade to meet the minister!"

"Just a sec," I call back.

Jade glances at me. "Let's run away." She says, starting to slip her feet out of those giant heels.

I smile at her. "We can't run yet."

"Why the hell not?" Jade inquires. "_Both _of our mothers are down there, ready to murder us with_ more _wedding crap."

I pull her behind one of the light-adorned fake palm trees and kiss her, mostly because it's the only thing that will keep me from granting her wish and running away to Hawaii. "I'm sure there are plenty of judges in Hawaii." Jade murmurs against my lips.

I stick my tongue in her mouth to keep from having to admit she can read my thoughts so easily. My cousin Gabrielle catches sight of us and tiptoes over, standing behind me and resting her chin on my shoulder. "Get a room." She whispers.

Jade and I pull away and Gabby laughs. "Don't tempt me Gabs." I say. "Jade's already to close enough to getting me to bail and elope with her in Hawaii."

"I am?"

_Crap. I sold myself out. _

Gabby just smiles brightly. "They're scary together, aren't they?" she giggles. "Maybe I'll grab Caleb and we'll make a break for it together."

One of the monsters, whoops, I mean, _mothers _starts calling for us again. "Wish us luck." I tell Gabrielle as I take Jade's hand again and head towards them.  
>"Luck," Gabby scoffs. "I'll pray for your souls."<p>

"Jade, Beck, this is Markus McCollum, he'll be marrying you two tomorrow."

I think about the awkwardness of that sentence, but then, I can't come up with very many alternate ways to say it. I decide to cut Mrs. West some slack, though she sure as Canada doesn't deserve it. Much less need it.

"Nice to meet you." I say for both of us, offering my free hand for him to shake.

"Pleased to meet you both."

Markus McCollum is a young guy, skinny with black rimmed glasses and short hair.

I keep a tight hold on Jade's right hand, just in case we have to make a break for it before Jade tries to shove some unfortunate object up the minister's nose or something. Because Markus McCollum is just the type of guy Jade would love to stuff in a trashcan.

Mundane things I'd rather not pen happen next. Decision after decision, Jade trying very hard not to kill anyone with her scissors (apparently, that sexy dress has pockets, and Jade being Jade…), and Gabrielle laughing at us: it's scarring, you know. By the time we got the actual rehearsal over with (_after _our wedding orchestrators had a conniption over a suit-opposed Sikowitz being the one to walk Jade down the aisle) I was ready to scream.

Tori, Andre, Cat, and Robbie all sit with us at the rehearsal dinner, and I'm pretty sure Jade will soon impale Tori with a fork. I pry said fork out of her hand as Tori says something else about how 'pretty' everything is. I pull Jade's hand under the table and squeeze it tightly. She glares at me for foiling her plan, but I just smile back at her.

"Can we please ditch now?" She whispers. "I need some anti-frustration sex."

This makes my smile widen. "We'd get caught trying to escape. Mom's at the table by the door."

"Andre!" Jade hisses across the table.

He looks up. "Jade!" He hisses back.

"You wanna sneak us out a window?" She motions to me and herself.

Andre smiles. "Of course I do! I've always wanted to do that. You know, if I knew how. Or had a rope"

Jade sits back and sighs. "Fuck."

I rub circles into the small of her back. "An hour, Babe, tops. Then we're out of here."

She nods, but she still doesn't look very happy.

"Why are you so mad about your wedding, Jade?" Tori asks.

Oh Tori. You don't realize what fury and pain you're about to unleash on yourself.

But, to my surprise, Jade just leans forward and whispers. "Because I have yet to be married to Beck, I have endured an extreme amount of crap to keep our so called 'families' happy and all I want to do is be married, fucking my husband in flippin Fiji." She slumps in her chair. "Or wherever. I don't care."

I find this sweet. I mean, for Jade, anyway. She really does want to marry me. I lean over and kiss her temple. "Two more days, Baby." I say.

"You know," Robbie comments. "I'm pretty sure that Jade was just _nice_."

Cat hits him. "Jadey is nice!" He, Andre, and Tori all stare at her. "Sometimes." She adds.

"Don't call me that, Cat." Jade clenches her jaw.

Cat pouts and Tori says "Do you have to be so mean?"

This time I'm not fast enough to stop her from throwing a fork at her. Tori shrieks. "Jade!"

Cat giggles. "Maybe you should take her to bed, Beck."

"Or lose me forever." Jade mumbles.

I smile. "Top Gun, Jade?"

"I've very tired, annoyed, and undersexed, Beckett." She snaps. "Don't criticize my choice of quote sources."

"Cover for us?" I ask Andre, standing up and grabbing Jade's hand.

He nods. "Sure man. Have fun." He smirks and Tori hits him.

We sneak past the front table, where Jade's mom and my parents sit, talking to a bunch of people I vaguely recognize as their friends from one of the many country clubs they belong to. My dad sees me and almost says something when Tori shoves Andre off of his chair. "Tori!" He yells. "Why would you do that?"

She winks and shoos us away. Thank Wisconsin for Tori Vega.

"Jadey?" I flop down on my bed, eyes closed, waiting for Jade to slip off her heels and join me.

"Beckett." She retaliates.

_Let's elope. _I want to say, but don't. Mostly because I'm too exhausted to pack a bag and book a flight. So instead I just sit up and reach for her. I've just got a grip her hand and am pulling her on top of me when the door opens.

"Cousin." My cousin (obviously) Cullen greets as if I wasn't about to throw something at him. "Future cousin." He aims at Jade.

"What the chizz are you doing here?" I groan as Jade grabs a textbook of the floor and throws it at him. Damn, she beat me to it.

Cullen emits a girlish scream as he dodges it. "Jade! What's wrong with you?"  
>"An overgrown frat boy is standing in the way of me getting laid." She hisses. "That's what's wrong with me."<p>

I laugh in spite of myself. "Beck!" Cullen whines. "Your fiancé is trying to murder me with knowledge!"

"She's been dealing with my mother, Cullen." I wonder why I'm arguing with my cousin when I'd much rather be doing fun, clothes-less things with my fiancé. So I add: "So get out."

"I came for a reason, you know." Cullen says.

"What's that?" I sigh, tightening my arms around Jade when she tries to get up. I don't care if the mood is ruined, I'm not letting go.

"You're busted. Aunt Jane noticed you two left when she wanted to introduce you and Jade to some dude from the country club."  
>"That's all you came for?" I ask incredulously. "I don't care! Get out!"<p>

Cullen puts his hands up in surrender. "Fine. Waffles, you people are uptight."

"Please let me shove my scissors up his ass." Jade begs as Cullen gloweringly slams the door to my RV.

I shake my head. "Come on. You don't really want to waste a good pair of scissors on him, do you?"

She sighs. "You have a point."

"You wanna risk getting caught by an irate country club mother?" I ask, trailing my hands up and down her sides.

Jade smirks. "Always."

* * *

><p>Ahahaha irate country club mothers. Scary chiz, man.<p>

REVIEW!

Much Love,

Calvin Munro


	19. Bet The New Form of Feminism

I'm so so sorry. I really am. The thing is, everything I do on fanfiction, I'm technically not allowed to do, so I'm trying very hard to be covert. And I got busted in some respects. I lost ALL of my writing. It's gone. Because of my parents. So I'm starting over, and because I almost NEVER get time alone, it's a miracle this got to y'all. Hang tight, okay?

Thanks.

So this kinda sucks, but maybe you'll forgive me on the grounds of my writing-deprived life? It's a little add on to Freak the Freak Out because I noticed that nobody ever tells Beck that he was the prize in the bet.

Disclaimer: Yeah yeah, whatever. I don't own it.

Oh and to the reviewer calling herself **RubyRocks666**: I try not to be nasty to mean reviewers (Know that you're the second in my years on being on FF), but your review was honestly inaccurate. I have chapters that don't mention sex. But even if I didn't, it wouldn't matter. We have a thing here on FF, we call it Don't Like, Don't Read. It means just what it says. If you are opposed to sex, don't read my story. But frankly, I don't understand someone who finds sex 'Disgusting'.

There are TONS of WAY WAY worse, really, really gross stories on here. My is at least mild.

Thirdly, if you don't want innuendo, read the K stories, where you'll be less likely to run into it.

Lastly, I find it EXTREMELY cowardly of people to leave unnecessary, rude, and unconstructive reviews in a manner that does not allow me to reply to them. I don't know if you'll ever read this, but if you do, writers need CONSTRUCTIVE advice, not a raving prude.

Thank you, I am finished ranting.

* * *

><p>Ugh! I HATE THOSE GIRLS! You have NO idea. What's worse? I just let Cat bet my boyfriend on the fact that we'll get more applause than they will.<p>

I swear I'm going insane.

It's not like I'm worried, though. We'll blast those little bitches all the way to Canada. I just, you know, don't wanna get this girl's hopes up. Or maybe that'd be good- so I can devastate them more thoroughly.

Beck's gonna be pissed though…

Especially 'cause I just stole his car keys. But whatever, he'll get over it eventually, and I'll make it up to him. Technically I'm doing this for him anyway- this way he doesn't have to kiss that ridiculous gank.

I'm being _nice._

"Um, Jade?"

Who dares interrupt my internal self-reassurance? I think I might have just made that term up. It was Tori, by the way. But by now we've lost all pretense of drama in the writing department.

"_What_?" Beck says it scares people when I use that tone of voice. Good.

"How mad do you think Beck is gonna be when he finds out you took his keys?"

"Why do _you_ care, Vega?"

"Jade!" Cat pokes me. "Be nice to her! She's helping us."

I huff, but let it go. "We wouldn't need help if the place wasn't rigged."

Tori rolls her eyes and Cat nods. "They're mean there." She agrees.

I text Beck as soon as we're on the highway- far enough away for him to be getting freaked out about the keys.

_Hey Babe, you can't leave Tori's. I took your car keys._

I can only imagine what's going on there. "On a scale of one to ten," I look in the rearview mirror to see Tori. "How physically detrimental is your sister?"

Tori bites her lips, that guilty look in her eyes. It's so innocent I want to slap it off her face. "Remember she started taking karate?"

I nod. "Speed it up, Vega."

"Sevenish."

"Got it."

My phone buzzes and I grin. It's Beck.

_You are in **so **much trouble._

_Hmm _I reply. _Intriguing __._

I imagine it'll be a minute of Trina-wrangling before he answers again so I put it in the cupholder and pretend I wasn't just texting while a cop passes me.

_Sometimes I worry about you. Very deeply._

Then, a second later:

_I can't believe you took my car keys and then changed the subject!_

_It's one of my many talents. _I remind him. _Remember that week we house-sat for your neighbors? ;)_

Needless to say he doesn't answer that. He knows he can't win.

* * *

><p>"Jade, tell me what's going on. <em>Details.<em>"

Damn. I should have never answered the phone. "Well," I stuff some more of Tori's hair into her ridiculous hat, holding the phone in between my ear and my shoulder. "Cat and I are about to win a bet."

Cat giggles as she attaches the fake nose to Tori's face. "We're so gonna win, ugly Tori!"

"A _bet? _Are you serious?"

Oh Beck, don't act so surprised. "Yeah, but don't worry. I'll win."

"And if you don't?" I hear a Trina-scream in the background, and Beck sighs heavily. "Just a sec." He says, and I listen to him yell across the room. "Trina! Let go of Robbie's hair!"

The disgusting thought crosses my mind that Beck would make a good dad.

"What did you bet?" Beck comes back.

And this is the complicated part. "Um, well..."

"Jade..." He warns.

That voice. Good God. He gets it when I do especially evil or stupid things. It's hot. "I guess I may have, you know, let Cat bet..."

"Ow! Jade! Be careful!" Tori screeches at my rearranging of her stick-on eyebrows.

"Bet _what_ Jade?" Beck pressures.

"Um... You."

I squeeze my eyes shut and wait for his reaction. "What do you mean you bet _me_?"

Geez Beck, so many italics. "You know the gank that's obsessed with you?" Might as well get it over with as straightforward as possible.

"Yeah...- Robbie! Don't let your head get that close to her mouth!- I'mma need you to tell me exactly what you bet, Jade."

He sounds like he's about to beat Trina to a pulp- which I would love- so I hurry up. "Cat promised the dark headed one that she could make out with you if she won."

Tori's eyes widen, and not just from the inadvertent waxing of her real eyebrows. I glare at her to make her shut up. "JADE!"

"Oh calm down, Beck. Don't be such a woman. We're going to win."

He starts to retort, so I hang up and hope he'll forgive me later.

* * *

><p>"This is a new level of crazy, Jade."<p>

Well, he's mad, but hey, at least he's still giving me a ride home. Or, more likely, to the RV. I'd rather be there anyway. It'd be something else to fight about if he took me home.

I shrug. "We won. What are you complaining about?"

He rolls his eyes, but his hand sneaks down to hold mine in between the seats. "You didn't even tell me until there was no going back on it. I would've had to make out with that girl if Tori lost."

"What are you? Heading up the cause for exploited men?"

We both grin. "I consider you my equal, ma'am." I tease.

He pretends not to find it funny. Go figure.

* * *

><p>That was little-edited so please forgive me. And thank you to everyone who's sticking with me. If any of you have ideas for stories you'd like to read, please let me know. I need some good ideas.<p>

Much Love,

Calvin Munro


	20. Pranking Sikowitz

Hola, las preciosas! This is quite short, but I hope to update in a more timely manner this week because I have the means for just this week :).

I want to thank you all for your sweet, sweet reviews, and for sticking with me. You all brighten up my every day :)

So this short drabble is, as the title indicates, based off of the Slap video Pranking Sikowitz. Beck just seemed especially disheveled, which made me happy because Dan is really using Beck to piss me off! I mean what WAS Tori Goes Platinum? SERIOUSLY!

Okay, I'm done ranting.

Disclaimer: I don't own Victorious cause I'm destined to be a hobo living in a box on the side of the road.

* * *

><p>"Okay, solve 'x over 3 plus y over 6 equals 18' in terms of x." Robbie says to Tori, holding his enormous Algebra II textbook up in front of his face.<p>

"UGH!" Tori groans. "I don't wanna do this anymore!" She sinks further into her red couch, covering her eyes with one hand.

"I don't understand why we can't just play pirates." Cat pipes up from her spot sitting on the counter.

"Come on, Tori," Robbie encourages. "Just one more problem."

"Nooooo," Tori whines, and it kind of reminds me of the way Jade used to act when I'd make her do homework. Which, really, is not all that surprising. Seeing as how everything seems to remind me of Jade these days.

"Let's prank call someone instead!" Tori decides as if it's actually a good idea, hopping off of the couch with sudden energy. But then, we're all so drunk on sleeplessness and sugar that go along with it and tape the whole thing.

But as I look at the camera, I can't help but think about Jade and wonder what she's doing tonight- if she's awake. I wish tonight were like any other when we were together. I wish I had her wrapped in my arms, lying in bed. I wish I could hear her voice telling me I have a 'cuddling problem'.

But I'm here and she's God knows where because wishes don't come true.

After a long moment of trying to keep myself from thinking of her being in some other guy's bed, I just let my head fall back on the couch and close my eyes. I dream of a night when I could nip at her ear to get her to yell at me, or nuzzle a kiss into her neck to make her whisper an 'I love you'. It's nice to fall asleep to, and I don't even notice the tears streaming down my face.

Because I'm Beck Oliver, and I don't cry

* * *

><p>Review please :) With is new FF makeover it's tons easier to leave a review so ya'll don't have that excuse anymore :P<p>

Much Love,

Calvin Munro


	21. Fraternizing at Tiffany's

I AM NOT DEAD! How happy are you, right? lol I've missed you! I am soooo sorry for the long hiatus, but I just didn't have a chance or the inspiration to update. Here is a quite long one-shot to say I'm sorry. REVIEW!

* * *

><p>"Seriously, Beck. Where the hell are we going?"<p>

Beck Oliver loves the element of surprise. Being completely unscramble (for the most part), he doesn't mind being the surprise-ee. But Jade? Surprises irk her. Not that there's much that doesn't irk Jade, it's just that she hates not knowing what's going on. She hates not being in control.

So when her boyfriend shows up at her door on a Saturday morning and tells her to get in the car, she's not exactly excited. First of all: she doesn't like going out in public on Saturdays (too many annoying people). Second, as much as she detests surprises, she despises admitting that Beck's stupid little puppy-dog look always gets her to give in even more.

But even though he knows all this, no matter how much she begs, Beck won't tell her where he's taking her. "You'll see, babe." He keeps saying.

And she kind of wants to punch him, because he's said that four time and it's really getting old. However, doing so would endanger her life, you know, since he's driving, so she refrains.

Jade suspects that he's probably taking her somewhere she'd never agree to go if he asked- like Tori Vega's for another one of her 'emergencies'. But she's totally caught off guard when Beck pulls into a Tiffany's parking lot. A thousand thoughts start racing across her mind.

Beck parks and takes the keys from the ignition. He flashes her a wide grin like he has the best idea in history. "Ready?"

But the only thing that comes out of Jade's mouth is "What the _fuck _are we doing here?"

It's not that Jade doesn't like jewelry-have you seen her? But a place like Tiffany's plus Beck in an enthusiastic mood spells disaster. And questions she'd rather leave unasked.

Beck's unfazed, though. He only jumps out of the GTO and heads for Jade's door. "Just trust me." He answers softly, his lips ghosting over hers when she continues to stare at him as if he's insane.

So she does. Even if she's convinced it's against her better judgement. He holds her hand and leads her inside, and she'd rather not let herself think that it's nice to be the one he's so excited to be with.

A young, zealous clerk pounces on them the moment they're in the door. "Hello folks! how are we today?"

"We're great, thanks." Beck answers easily before Jade can tear into the employee with a 'I refuse to be associated with you in any manner and if you use the world 'folks' again I'll personally set you on fire.'

Within minutes, the clerk( whose nametag read the unfortunate truth of being named 'Barry') had Jade sitting on a little bench in front of a 'U'-shaped glass counter full of rings, Beck standing behind her. "Beck!" Jade hisses, jerking her boyfriend down to her eye-level. "You know I don't believe in marriage. Or stupidly expensive jewelry."

"I know." He winks at her and twists to kiss her cheek.

She gives him a dubious look, but releases his shirt as an older man comes back to the other side of the 'U' alongside Barry. "So," he begins without a trace of a smile. "We're looking for a wedding ring?"

"No!" Jade replies adamently just as Beck pipes up with a "Sure!"

She glares at him, adding "I don't believe in marriage."

If the man behind the counter with Barry wasn't looking at Beck and Jade disapprovingly before, he is now. But Beck remains unfazed. "Do you have anything black?" He asks.

"Black?" Barry repeats, glancing at his supervisor, who was blessed with a slightly more forgiving name tag reading 'Elias'.

"I believe we do." Elias huffs and spins on his heel, glad to leave the young couple behind.

AS soon as he's gone, Jade turns around to tear her boyfriend to pieces. "What the _fuck _are you doing?"

"Come on, babe, this is fun." He coaxes.

"Fun? Your idea of fun is telling people we're engaged, pretending to buy absurdly expensive jewelry, and garnering dirty looks from the kind of people I hate the most?"

"You hate alot of people, Jade, it's hard to keep up." He smiles and she smacks him.

"That's not the point!"

"And what is the point, exactly?"

Their eyes meet and both of them are suddenly serious. "Why are do you doing this?" Jade whispers.

He leans closer, whispering too when he says "Just let me pretend."

But then Elias returns, Barry-less, breaking the spell. Beck slips behind his girlfriend on the bench, a leg on either side of hers. And for whatever reason, Jade complies with her boyfriend's request and tries on all the rings he likes- and the ones he hates, because she's Jade and she can only be so sweet.

Beck doesn't let her look at the price tags, just asks her which one she likes best. "This one." She replies as they both watch her slip on a silver-banded ring with three small black stones on her scarred left hand.

Beck reaches his arms out around her, hands coming to cradle her left. There's one big black stone in the middle, raised up and diamond-shaped flanked by two smaller replicas of it on either side. He can feel the callouses on her fingertips and the red scares somehow seem to go perfectly with his own dark-skinned, ink-stained hands, rough from working on cars.

"One day." He whispers in her ear. "One day we'll do this for real."

Jade puts the ring back in to box and pushes it gently toward Elias. Beck thanks him and Elias gives them a tight smile before walking away, relieved. He knew they were penniless in the first place.

* * *

><p>They're at the beach about a week later, at sunset, watching the waves of a low tide roll in. They've been talking a little bit. About school, plays, parents, Beck's perverted fish. But for the most part, they've been quiet, just enjoying each other's nearness. It's been a long week.<p>

There are plenty of people on this beach because of the nice weather, but for tonight Jade's decided not to care. As long as no one tries to talk to her, she'll be quiet about it. Because tonight, she has something to say. Something she's been working up to for a week now and she doesn't want some stupid fight to ruin it. She doesn't really want to say it, but people are always barking at her about give and take. "You're lucky to have Beck, don't be such a gank!" Whatever, he's just as lucky to have her.

Nevertheless, she knows she's going to say it anyway. She draws a deep breath, stares out at the ocean. "I still don't believe in marriage." She reminds him.

He turns to her but she resolves to keep her eyes on the water. "I know that, Jade."

"But," She continues as if he hadn't spoken. Another deep breath. "If I did," She draws her knees just slightly closer to her chest. "I suppose that-that it would be you I'd believe in it for." Finished with her proclamation, she puts her chin on her knees, and wraps her arms around her legs.

Beck is grinning so widely, he should be glad Jade can't see him or she'd slap it right off his face. His slips his arm around her. "So what you're saying is, you love me so much, and I'm the best thing that's ever happened to you and that you'll love me forever?" He jostles her, trying to get a response.

"Whatever." She grunts.

He grins wider. "What you're saying is I light up your world like nobody else?"

At this she turns her head. "Do. Not. Sing."

But it's too late. He's already standing up, singing at the top of his lungs, dancing around like an idiot. "Beck! Stop it! Beck!"

But he bends down, grabbing her hands and pulling her to her feet, swinging her around despite her protests. She yells, but doesn't make too much of an effort to get away. When he finally stops singing, he keeps her close to his body, leaning down, and whispering against her lips. "I love you too."

* * *

><p>Thanks guys! I've been getting a bunch of favorites and alerts and that's great, but I'm really more interested in what you think. If you're going to favorite or alert then please please PLEASE review as well. If you'd like more regular updates, please give me some ideas in your review.<p>

Much Love,

Calvin Munro


	22. Coffee on the Floor

TWO UPDATES IN ONE WEEK! WOOT WOOT! lol Here is a rather odd chapter. I'm not sure I like it. This is most likely going to be written a few hundred times, a few of which I'll post here. I REFUSE TO CHOOSE ONE GET-BACK-TOGETHER SENARIO UNTIL IT HAPPENS ON VICTORIOUS!

Oh, and I forgot this last time: Disclaimer: I do not own Victorious, just my ideas and story lines. And the extremely gut-bursting, rofling hilarity :)

Anyway. Here is is:

* * *

><p>The Slap<p>

Beck Oliver

Accidentally just brewed a whole pot of coffee. If no one comes over to help me drink it, I'm going to have a very long and jittery night.

Mood: Hyper

* * *

><p>I'm not saying I can't sleep without her. That's just totally not true. I'm Beck Oliver, I know how to sleep by myself. I'm not THAT pathetic.<p>

Okay, so maybe.

But it's not my fault.

Her body didn't have to fit so damn perfectly into mine.

She didn't have to indulge the so-called 'cuddle problem' I don't have.

Look, all I'm saying is that I shouldn't make things worse by drinking a bunch of coffee.

Which isn't to say that I- _SLAM! _

MOTHER OF MARY!

"You said you had coffee. I'm here to steal it."

I swallow hard, try to stop freaking out. "YOU JUST KICKED MY DOOR IN!" Well, so much for not freaking out.

Jade cocks an eyebrow. "And?"

'YOU SCARED THE CRAP OUTTA ME!" I'm standing now, my laptop in my hand like I was going to throw it at the intruder.

Jade moves into my little kitchen area, grabbing a mug out of my cabinet and switching off the coffee pot. "That's good for you. Now you can think about what you should do if someone _really _broke into your RV." She starts rummaging around for sugar. "I mean, seriously, What was your plan? Throw your laptop at me?"

She snorts. I stare at her incredulously. Firstly for knowing exactly my plan and secondly because she's in my kitchen, making coffee as if it's no big deal. "No..." I mutter, coming up behind her and grabbing the sugar out of a drawer. She's still ransacking another cabinet, so I just put the equivalent of two sugars in her coffee while she mumbles something like "Always moving the fucking sugar."

She turns around, catching me in the act. "Dude, you don't have to poison girls to get them to hang around."

I say nothing, just hand her the cup, still trying to wrap my mind around what's happening right now. Jade plops down on my couch, turning on the TV and flipping through the channels. I think about what to do. I could kick her out, but I'd never forgive myself. I could ask her why she's here, but I'd either get a snarky answer or start a fight. Or, I could just fix my own cup of coffee and sit next to her.

I choose the latter.

Jade has an old episode of Top Gear on, which is surprising until they start insulting each other. Jade chuckles. "I should've been British. They have such awesome insults."

As she watches the British guys drive through a jungle, I study her. I take in her black clothes, which don't mask the fact that she's lost weight. A lot of it. I see dark circles under her eyes, and wonder if she has trouble sleeping without me. Her skin seems even more pale than usual, and the way she curls her fingers around her steaming cup tells me she's cold.

"Stop looking at me like that." Jade orders.

"Why?" I question. I want to know what she'll say.

She turns her head slowly. "You don't have the right."

I lean closer. "Since when do I not have the right to look at you?"

Her eyes water slightly. "Since you let me go."

She stands up, about to leave, but I can't let that happen. I stand up too. "Jade-"

She spins around. "When did you stop loving me?"

I drop my coffee cup in surprise. "You think I stopped loving you?"

She shrugs. "What reason did I have not to think so? You left me standing outside Tori's front door like an idiot," She ticks them off on her fingers, one by one. "You tried to jump her bones, and you went out with her."

"First of all, I never tried to jump her bones. All I did was almost kiss her. And that was never a date. I told you that." My voice gets louder with every denial. "But honestly, even if I did those things, what should have stopped me? _You _were the one who left _me _Jade. _You_ walked out on _me_. _You_ never came back."

"I tried to come back!" Jade yells at me. "Again and again!"

"Oh yeah? because it seemed like all you ever did around me was pick fights."

"Don't you get it? I don't know how to get you back! You're just so damn confusing, never letting anything out, never letting anything in!"

"What do you want me to do, Jade?" I ask. "Tell me what to do, because I can't make sense of anything anymore!"

"I wanted you to follow me!" Finally. The truth. "I wanted you to come after me and let Tori and all the others know that you loved me and that I was important to you!"

I make some sound between a sigh and a snort. I pinch the bridge of my nose. I stop yelling. "You are the most important person in my life, Jade." I take a step closer. "I have loved you for so long, it's hard to remember a time when I didn't." I take her bag out of her hand, set it on the ground. "Being without you has fucked me up the the point where I can't sleep. I miss you in all the little ways, and the big ways."

I take her face in my hands, look at her averted eyes. "I don't know what else to say, except that I love you. I still do. I'll never stop."

Her lips crash into mine, and all of a sudden, our tongues are fighting and our bodies are close and I can feel her against me and it's the first time I've felt okay in a long time. I lead her to the bed, lower her down first before landing on top of her, situated between her legs. My lips are on hers, her neck, her shoulders, her collarbone, everywhere. But I stop, pull myself up on my elbows. Her hands still at the edge of my shirt.

I change my mind, getting off the bed and pulling her with me. She looks confused, even more so when I kneel in front of her. "Jadelyn August West, will you take me back?"

Her face relaxes, she gives a snort of a laugh. "Yes, you nerd. You're mine."

I grin. "Yours." I agree.

If you must know what happened after that, you perverts, I made her pancakes. Banana ones. And some more coffee, seeing as how all of ours is now on the floor. (After that? You're gonna have to visit the M section, baby :))

* * *

><p>THANKS FOR READING! REVIEW!<p>

Much Love,

Calvin Munro


	23. She is Love

**Yes, I abandoned you. I left you all alone like a pack of baby wolves to fend for yourselves and your feelings. I apologize. Deeply. I fell in love. And it got sabotaged by circumstance. In that process, I lost my love for writing. I'm trying to get it back, so please bear with me while I try to get back into the groove. Also, if this is less fluffy and more ****angst-y, blame my bruised little heart. **

* * *

><p>"Beck, I'm stuck." Jade's voice is loud, cutting through the quiet I was surrounded in just seconds ago.<p>

I sit up in bed, barely awake. "What?" It's still dark outside, and my eyes are clouded with sleep.

"I'm stuck." She repeats. "The stupid car ran out of gas and I'm stuck on the side of the road."

She doesn't sound scared, just annoyed. _Oh God, _I think, _she will definitely find a way to make this my fault. _"Okay," I twist out of the blankets and sit on the edge of my bed, feeling around blindly for my boots. "Where are you?"

"Northridge."

My entire body stiffens. "Northridge?! Jade! What the hell are you doing in Northridge at two in the morning?"

She sighs, as if I am a stupid creature she's forced to deal with. "I'm looking for Cat's brother. She called and said he was missing."

I groan, pulling on a shirt and finding my keys. "And you didn't call me _because_?"

Jade has never been a particularly reasonable person, but still, being alone in Northridge at night is an absolutely horrible idea. I head out the door, starting up my truck and turning on some heat. It's getting colder every day now.

"I didn't think about it." Jade says.

I shake my head. "Bullshit." I don't know why she's lying to me, but at this point, I don't care. "Give me a street name or a landmark you see."

"Lombardo. I'm across the street from an abandoned drug store."

"Got it."

Despite knowing I should probably keep her on the line, I hang up. Things have been strained lately, to say the least. I let Jade get away with a lot of shit, but sometimes it just gets to be too much. School is stressful, and family is stressful, and sometimes our relationship isn't as strong as we want it to be.

My mind drifts as I drive down the semi-deserted streets. There's something poetic about driving at night. About the lights and the darkness they penetrate, and the stillness when you get onto backroads where hardly anyone is driving alongside you. You feel small and alone and whole and at peace all at the same time.

I want to fix what has broken me and Jade. I want to wake up with her beside me and listen to her sing in the shower. I just have to find out how to do that.

When I finally pull onto Lombardo Road, I see Jade right off the bat, sitting on the hood of her car, her legs hanging over. She doesn't look worried in the least, but I can see the faintest traces of anxiety in the swinging of her feet. I shut off the engine and climb out of the truck, but she doesn't look up.

I settle myself on the hood beside her and sigh. "Hey."

"I called Cat." She tells me, still not meeting my eyes. "She found him right after I ran out of gas."

"Good." I'm not going to give her an easy way out of this. She's going to have to figure out how to tell me the truth.

"I'm sorry, Beck."

I pull my feet up and rest my heels on the bumper. "Yeah? Why's that?"

Jade scowls. "I shouldn't have gone out alone this late. I should've paid more attention. I should've stopped fighting with you over stupid things a long time ago."

The last apology comes out of her mouth around a lump in her throat. "Are you," She stops, breathes deeply, and finally looks at me. "Are you mad?"

I rub my eyes, feeling the late hour catch up with me. "Yes."

"Oh."

She lowers her face again, but I reach out and grab her chin, gently lifting her face. "But I'll get over it." I promise.

Jade's body relaxes, and I lean in to kiss her lips. "Now, let's get you home."

* * *

><p>By the time we get gas in her car and drive back to the RV, it's after three, and I'm just about ready to drop. But Jade looks more awake than she does most of the time. "Pancakes?" She asks, something I've come to recognize as her polite way of saying "Make me some pancakes, Beck."<p>

If I didn't love her with every fiber of my being, I would say no. But alas, I do love her, more than anything. So I get the pancake mix out of the cabinet. "Banana?" I ask.

She gives me a look that would lead anyone to believe that I just asked the most ignorant question possible. "Chocolate chip, obviously."

Obviously.

"I'm going to take a shower, okay?" She doesn't wait for me to answer.

* * *

><p>After I finish the pancakes, Jade's still in the shower, singing a song I don't recognize in a low, melodious tone. I sit with my back against the bathroom door, listening. I've missed this.<p>

I close my eyes and lean my head back against the door. The smell of pancakes permeates the room, and the sound of Jade's beautiful voice fills my ears. "I've been beaten down, I've been kicked around, but she takes it all for me. And I've lost my faith in my darkest days, but she makes me want to believe. They call her love, love, love, love, love. They call her love, love, love, love, love. She is love, and she is all I need."

Yes, she is love. And she is all I need.


End file.
